Cocaine Bear review: Meme-ready horror-comedy offers less highs than hoped
Director Elizabeth Banks doesn't shy away from the gore or the absurdity of this barely true story that stars Keri Russell, Alden Ehrenreich, and Ray Liotta
Film Reviews Cocaine
Cocaine Bear is a movie that was already a certain kind of hit before it even came out thanks to its idiotic premise and outrageously blunt name. And while it is enjoyable and has many great moments, it doesn’t quite come together with polish. If this reminds you of the Samuel L. Jackson vehicle Snakes On A Plane, well, it’s no surprise. This movie is better than that 2006 momentary phenomenon (bears make funny faces and are fuzzy, after all) but keep Snakes On A Plane in mind should you buy a ticket to Cocaine Bear—it’s important to manage expectations for the quality of the high being offered.
Cocaine Bear is directed by the abundantly talented actress Elizabeth Banks, whose previous turns behind the camera include the very successful Pitch Perfect 2 and her 2019 stab at Charlie’s Angels with Kristen Stewart. It’s written by Jimmy Warden, who shares a credit on the very bad Netflix film The Babysitter: Killer Queen, and is loosely (extremely loosely) based on a real incident in which a drug runner dumped a bunch of cocaine out an airplane and then parachuted after it. For reasons probably less dopey than what’s seen in Cocaine Bear, he failed to open his chute and died. The drugs landed in Georgia’s Chattahoochee National Forest, where a bear found it, ate it, and also died.
The film does not stick too closely to the facts, trying instead to invent a Fargo-esque carnival of dumbass criminals, cops, and civilians all tangling with a ferocious bear whacked out on coke. There are some aspects that really work. One thing to admire throughout is how the picture leans into the scuzz. Right from the beginning there are little kids (Brooklyn Prince, from The Florida Project, and the extremely amusing Christian Convery) with potty mouths who intentionally and happily swallow some of the cocaine. In a world where comedy is so bland and safe, it’s good and right to be reminded that some movies—especially movies called Cocaine Bear—don’t really care if they offend.
The bear’s future victims are in the forest, where the kids have gone after skipping school, and where their mother (Keri Russell) has gone to find them. Later, mom meets a park ranger (Margo Martindale) and a nature expert (Jessie Tyler Ferguson). Also there are drug dealers (Alden Ehrenreich, O’Shea Jackson Jr., and Ray Liotta) looking for the missing stash, plus a cop played by Isiah Whitlock Jr. who has a very funny bit of business realizing that once he’s climbed up on a gazebo roof he has no way of getting down.
The kills—and there are many—are gross and hilarious. There is one stretch that involves a flubbed escape that gets surprisingly brutal, but it’s still darkly funny when a growling black bear with white powder all over his snout leaps in slow motion as Depeche Mode’s “Just Can’t Get Enough” plays on the soundtrack. Less funny and more annoying is kicking the picture off with Jefferson Starship’s “Jane,” a terrific song, but one that’s already owned by the film and series Wet Hot American Summer. (Extra weird: Elizabeth Banks is in that!)
During the time in which Cocaine Bear is set, the U.S. government urged people to “just say no.” But considering this is a gleefully flawed movie in which a bear snorts a line off a severed leg, and the “drugs as Popeye’s spinach” trope is used to its finest effect since The Wolf Of Wall Street, let’s amend that famous phrase in the name of Cocaine Bear to “just say sure.”
Cocaine Bear opens in theaters on February 24
140 Comments
I was never going to see this, but I am rooting for it nonetheless. I am in favor of Hollywood making more batshit meme-movies.
same.
This movie blows
So you’re turning up your nose?
Really crosses the thin white line for you, huh?
Unbearable would you say?
Get off your high horse!
PUN FOULwrong drug
I might just take a powder on it then.
Yeah, there snow way I’m watching this movie.
I ski what you’re doing there
I hear it starts ok and then goes off the rails.
There’s quite a few bumps in the story line along the way.
They should have cut parts of the movie — with talcum powder!
Not even a snort laugh.
What did you want from it that it didn’t deliver? Sounds like it had a cocaine bear and a bunch of hilarious graphic kills. Was there an aspect of this advertised that I missed that disappointed you? Or were you always too good for Cocaine Bear and saw it so you could shit on it? I’m sorry you were unable to have the dumb fun this looks like.
Psst! A nickname for cocaine is “blow” 😉
Uh, I don’t think you understand what’s happening here. Go back and read all of the comments in the thread.
I can see how people who take themselves too seriously might not be interested in this film.
The one true thing about this story that’s actually somewhat interesting is that the bear, after dying and being taxidermied, was owned by country music legend and cocaine aficionado Waylon Jennings.I’d say maybe that’s in the movie but since the bear is alive for most of it it’d have to be the end or a post-credits scene. Plus unless the actor is wearing a Waylon T-shirt most of the intended audience wouldn’t recognize who is being portrayed.
They could get Shooter Jennings to reprise his role as his dad from Walk the Line.
Was this Ray Liotta’s final movie?
Bear with me and I’ll find out.
That’s like “Raul Julia in Street Fighter” level shit.
Jesus I would hope this is a better movie than Street Fighter.
Some bar to clear.
A Tuesday?
but never on a Sunday
Although Julia knew he was dying and did the movie both for the paycheck and that his kids were fans of the game.
Ursa silly.
It’s where he drew the line.
Checkmate, honey…
On the “most embarrassing final movie for a well-respected actor” scale, I’d rank this somewhere between Orson Welles voicing Unicron and Sean Connery voicing an elderly skateboarding veterinarian.
Those were both voice roles – Julia was on set, in that red leather costume, giving it all he had left in him because damnit his kids were going to enjoy his last role. And he absolutely sold the premise that he, Raul Julia, was a formidable opponent against Jean Claude van Damme.
Raul Julia also got to have a holiday with his kids before they got to filming his scenes while on location.https://www.polygon.com/features/2014/3/10/5451014/street-fighter-the-movie-what-went-wrong
I always forget Peter Sellers last movie isn’t Being There its Fu Manchu. How embarrassing.
I actually quite enjoyed The Fiendish Plot of Dr Fu Manchu. I was quite young at the time I saw it, though.Quite funny that in this film in retrospect that Helen Mirren played a decoy for the queen (a fictitious one, not Elizabeth).
Maybe the last one he filmed? But I know he was in a Charlie Day movie that hasn’t been released. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fool%27s_Paradise_(2023_film)
Maybe “Jane” is to Elizabeth Banks what “Gimme Shelter” is to Scorsese.
I’m more excited for the sequel, Heroin Heron.
The new Speedy Gonzalez reboot is not about his being fast….
and the Netflix limited run series Peyote Coyote
Partnered with Ecstasy Egret.
Marijuana Iguana rounds out the trilogy.
I think we have the beginnings of a DACU here.
seriously quality punnage.
I don’t like this hardcore gritty version of Molly Of Denali…
There’s undoubtedly already live-action performances of “Meth Gator” throughout Florida…
The problem with Opium Opossum is that it’s hard to tell if he’s playing dead or just asleep.
Don’t forget Molly Wallaby.
If you want to hang out, you’ve gotta take Keri Russell out, cocaine bear
If you want to get down, down with Ray Liotta, cocaine bearShe don’t lie, she don’t lie, she don’t lie
Cocaine bearIf you got bad news, you want to mess up a bunch of dudes, cocaine bear
When your day is done, and you want to run, cocaine bearShe don’t lie, she don’t lie, she don’t lie
Cocaine bear
I’d like to give you a star, but I can’t because the original Clapton song is awful and his vocal and entire approach is narcolepsy-inducing and now I’m falling asleep….
“Original” Eric Clapton song? JJ Cale would like a word.
Acknowledged that the original original was by JJ Cale, but it’s the Clapton version that is more well-known and got (and still gets) the airplay and makes me want to stick a sharp pencil in my ear. Why does a guy singing about cocaine sound like he’s on quaaludes?
Now I want a song where someone is frenetically screaming about Xanax.
Why does a guy singing about cocaine sound like he’s on quaaludes? It was Clapton – probably he was on both.
Yeah, Clapton is an ignorant douche, but I’ll trust his expertise in this particular area…
we all know he wasnt a very good babysitter
Clapton apparently had a coke habit during the Cream years, but yeah, by the time he recorded Cocaine booze was his main tipple.
Because inherent to J.J. Cale’s message via the song is that the long-term use of the indicated drug evidences itself in losing its ‘helpful’ energy-inducing qualities and instead leaving one sounding even more laggard and exhausted than before.
Came here to make the same observation. Kudos.
I remember hearing that song on a classic rock radio station one day, obviously uncensored, and then later that day hearing Nicki Minaj’s “Super Bass” on another station in which the line “he might sell coke” was censored. Learned a lot about double standards in censorship that day. Don’t think it’s a coincidence that the hip-hop/R&B stations always have the strictest edits, way beyond what the FCC mandates.
Good point. Weird that I often hear censored the “roll another joint” line in Tom Petty’s You Don’t Know How it Feels. Rolling joint=bad. Maybe selling coke=bad. Not (“She don’t like, she don’t like…”) liking cocaine=OK! Also OK, the guy Tom Petty’s singing to in Listen to her Heart (impliedly) not being able to take away his girl “with your money and your cocaine.” Maybe if the drug reference is arguably negative….
It’s “she don’t lie” not “she don’t like”
They still censor The Doors Break on Through, so idk if its about anything.
It’s not an original Clapton song. J.J. Cale wrote it and released his version before Clapton…..and it’s terrific, sorry should have looked at the replies below before posting. But still, drawing attention to Cale’s original version is well worth it. Cale’s version retains a sense of menace that the song deserves.
Take a whiff on me . . . bear
RockBearsVision dreams of fur
(Blowin’ through my mind)
And all the while I think of Winnie the PoohA very strange reaction
(For us to unwind)
The more I see, the more I do
(Something of a phenomenon) Paddington
(Tellin’ your body to come along)
(But, white lines blow away)Freeze
Rock
Freeze
Rock
Freeze
Rock
Freeze
RockHigher, baby
(Ahhh) Get higher, Fozzie
(Ahhh) Get higher, Fozzie
And don’t ever come down
I’m still holding out for an LSD shark movie.
But how was a shark exposed to LSD?
At a rave.
Well LSD dolphin is close enough.
Go tell it to Fa, pal!
Could this inspire TikTok Challenges of drugging dangerous animals to see what happens? Sharks would be tough, but Alligators on Crack? Doable.
People do love to abuse animals, so yes.
If this does well maybe someone will buy my script for Meth Monkey
Quaalude Kangaroo
Kangaroos always act like they’re on disco biscuits.
PCPeacock
Take your star and get out of my damn sight.
My greatest triumph. Old school.
https://ew.com/movies/cocaine-bear-elizabeth-banks-cocaine-shark-conditions/
Oh man, imagine if the next Sharknado movie also involves the government burning a cartel cocaine manufacturing center and the drug fumes going into the atmosphere…
I kind of liked the Babysitter movies. Crazy and camp, but entertaining slashers.
Wednesday: ‘Cocaine Bear’ is one of Hollywood’s best beast vs. man flicks.Thursday: ‘Cocaine Bear’ is okay, I guess.
“Jefferson Starship’s “Jane,” a terrific song”I never expected to see this phrase in print in my life.
very curious to see how this does.obviously snakes on a plane was the first movie that miscalculated online chatter vs real-life…but real-life is a lot more online these days. the trailer goes off like gangbusters every time i see it in a theatre and it’s really the only new movie.that being said, i can still see a lot of the general public shrugging and going ‘looks dumb’.
The problem is that people aren’t gonna wanna see this in theaters, they’re gonna wanna get fucked up at home and stream it.
I don’t remember when Snakes came out but I feel like this is the perfect weekend for a movie called Cocaine Bear. It’s post Football, post valentines but pre-early blockbuster season. The weather is still shit and people are probably tired of seeing Avatar 2 by now. The only competition is Ant Man but I think word of mouth has sunk that ship.
yeah exactly. i guess if your other option is ant man 3, cocaine bear doesn’t look or sound any less dumb.
Am I crazy or does it feel like the review just cut off? That last paragraph doesn’t flow or feel like a conclusion at all. Also it might be worth noting this is among Ray Liottas last roles.
Sadly the reviewer was eaten by a Cocaine bear before they could finish
Id probably applaud if *eaten by bear* was the last sentence.
Exit, pursued by a cocaine bear
Look, AV Club, if you’re not going to refer to her by her full title, “Beloved Character Actress Margo Martindale”, then I don’t know what we’re doing here.
The funny thing about Bojack Horseman doing that is that I actually learned her name. Yes, I liked her in Justified and The Americans, but I didn’t really put a name to her face before that.
Seems fitting that Ray Liotta’s swan song would have cocaine in the title. RIP
They’ve got some smart marketing. I love that this movie comes with a little baggie of cocaine when you buy a ticket. It is a little weird that I had to buy tickets in the alley behind the theater though
I wasn’t going to see this, but I might just for the Keri Russell/Margo Martindale reunion.
In my head canon, Keri Russell loved the script so much, she turned down many serious roles just to ensure Cocaine Bear got made.
Also, Matthew Rhys has a cameo in the first scene.
I sorta knew that he was in it going in, but in that opening scene I was thinking, “Nah, that’s not…” And yeah, it was.Wonderful stunt mustache work from ClarkPhilipMatthew, as always.
Matthew Rhys also has a very short and sweet cameo, unfortuntely he doesn’t have scenes with the other Americans characters.
It also gives you Keri Russell doing her favourite thing: effortlessly (and helmetlessly) riding a bike.
Sigh… i lived in her neighborhood for years and somehow never ran into her on bike or otherwise…
but does it successfully launch the cocaine animal cinematic universe?
I don’t need Cocaine Bear to win, I just need Ant-Man to lose.
The fact that Quantumania features a similar variation on that exact line means I regret only having one star to give.
You know that exact line was in the trailer right?
Headline writer: a “high” is a countable noun. It should read “fewer highs” not “less highs.” You can say, “I was less high than my friend because I snorted less cocaine” because ‘cocaine’ is uncountable.
And, if you’re a bear, unbeatable.
I want this to do well because I love Elizabeth Banks and it’s always been inexplicable to me that she wasn’t a bigger star. But, based only on the trailers I’ve seen, this sounds like a great title and premise without a story to tell.I hope I’m pleasantly surprised.
I don’t get it from the review…IS IT FUN? Because the things being described sound fun. Is the pacing off? Is the delivery bad? Rate it on the Ebert scale, does it get done what it is trying to do? Snakes on a Plane was fucking terrible, so comparing it to that is not great. Are you just being a killjoy? Or is it actually not going to be worth getting high and watching?
Lotta quibbling in the review, but B- is a pretty good rating in my books. I’m going to assume that it’s fun/funny, since it’s a horror comedy.
You didn’t like Snakes on a Plane? How about Pacific Rim? I like movies that take a ridiculous concept (snakes in a plane or Mecha beating up Kaiju) and just run with it.
I went to see it because of the concept but it was much more mean-spirited and less fun than I imagined. It was a horror nerd’s idea of fun, people wanted someone fighting a snake with a roll of toilet paper or something and the film instead showed snakes biting people on the throat until they puked and the light left their eyes. Not fun for most.
Oh.I suspect you won’t enjoy Cocaine Bear if your problem is too much gore. Personally for me and most people I know who watched it, the gore and violence was the main highlight of Snakes on A Plane. The downside was just the flimsy plot, terrible dialogue, and mostly mediocre acting.
Snakes at least gave us the immortal TV edit I’ve had it with these monkey fighting snakes on this monday to friday plane. It was worth it for that.
the anti-evolutionists require that sentence to be tv-ma
the anti-evolutionists require that sentence to be tv-ma
I just watched Cocaine Bear and it was fun. I was laughing throughout the whole movie and so was the rest of the audience.
Just saw it today. It is quite fun. Not nearly as mean-spirited as *Snakes On a Plane*, thankfully, but more darkly comedic.That said, though, it is also not the most perfect version of itself possible, for three reasons:1. The pacing of the movie’s first third is off because it’s trying to follow four separate characters on their way to the mountain where stuff goes down.2. While overall the movie definitely delivers on the bear carnage it promises, most of the kills, (i.e. the actual moments of death) lack the kind of punch or impact that would make them feel like the proper finish to a sequence. I’m not talking about gore here (there is plenty of that, actually), but instead the way that, say, an action director knows how to make a sequence feel climactic and really pop, you know?3. Finally, the movie uses three Family Guy-style quick smash-cuts to something mentioned offhand, and that’s at least two too many.That said, though, those are quibbles. If you consider a B- to be about 3 1/2 stars out of 5, then I’d say it’s an accurate score. Not a masterpiece, but not trying to be, either, so definitely the perfect sort of movie to throw on some idle Saturday afternoon when you’re bored.
It is a very silly and enjoyable movie. Ironically, the closest comparison I could make is to Wet Hot American Summer, but much gorier.
i fucking loved it
So, despite the title, it’s not a helluva movie?
i didnt know ice cube had a kid that acted.
Cocaine Bear review: Meme-ready horror-comedy offers less highs than hopedFewer.
This really was a fun movie. I wouldn’t recommend paying a ton or going out of your way to see it, but it does what it says in the title, and more.
I saw this last night. Overall its a pretty weak film.
‘Fewer’ highs. Not less. Come on, people.
This movie sounds exactly like what I was hoping for! Ray Liotta being in this really gives me perspective on how long these things take to make considering he died almost a year ago. I agree with the over-use of Starship Jefferson’s “Jane” but oh my god I love that song.
gee, I wonder if Elizabeth Banks will blame sexism if this movie bombs.
you suck dude.
how am I wrong? she acted like a victim/moron because her last awful film bombed, and blamed the audience. classic feminist move.
I loved it, B to B+ but yes it’s not as crazy insane fun as I was thinking. I was thinking but still a fucking great time!
Regarding Banks quite deliberately using Jane: given the film’s era, Cocaine Bear is clearly in the WHAS Universe.
*fewer
Immediately off the rails.