Britney Spears is “buying a horse soon” as she reportedly heads for divorce
Amid multiple reports that Spears and husband Sam Asghari have separated, Spears' publicly stated concern seems to be whether she should buy "Roar" or "Sophie"
Aux News Britney Spears
There are a shocking number of horse-related idioms one could use to describe a faltering relationship. Maybe they picked the wrong horse, or put the cart before the horse. He just couldn’t get off his high horse, you know? Perhaps she shouldn’t have looked a gift horse in the mouth. They really just needed to hold their horses on the whole thing. And so on.
So, when Britney Spears posts that she’s “Buying a horse soon (horse emoji)!!!” less than 24 hours after TMZ first reported that the pop star and husband Sam Asghari were separated and may be heading for divorce, one could be forgiven for assuming that the “horse” in question was more of the metaphorical variety. But… nope! This is the cheetah lover-in-chief we’re talking about here. You kind of have to take whatever she says at face value.
The notes app divorce notice? Tired. Stream-of-consciousness announcing the new pet you intend to buy? Absolutely wired.
Per Spears’ post, there are “so many options” for her new equine friend that “it’s kinda hard.” She could get Sophie or she could get Roar (presumably the handsome gentlehorse featured in the post). She just “can’t make up my mind (monkey covering eyes emoji)!!!”
The “Mind Your Business” singer also beseeched her followers for some fashion advice: “Should I join the camaraderie and put a pink cowboy hat on (tongue out emoji)???” She may mean “community” here, but honestly, who are we to impose such a basic interpretation on the pop princess’ words?
Whether or not the pink cowboy hat (possibly an homage to Barbie?) is donned or not, it sounds like Britney is more than happy with her new partner-in-crime, Roar. “Either way I think I found my sweet spot with Roar (kissy face emoji)!!!” she wrote. Whether or not the couple reconcile or actually file for divorce, it sounds like Britney has no problem holding her own reins.
16 Comments
If it weren’t for my horse I wouldn’t have spent that year in college.
What? Is she going full Victorian?
she loves to post a photo from 9 months ago and make up a completely false story about where she is and what she’s doing. truly one of our greatest insane celebrities.
Have we considered the possibility that “horse” is cockney rhyming slang for “divorce?”
I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who immediately though this. Or maybe that she needed a new horse because she got “de-horsed” and had to put it down.
Or given her recent mental state, heroin.
If these two can’t make it, what chance do the rest of us have?Maybe the Tuohy’s can look after her. I hear they are available.
Yikes
She could date Elon and get one free.
House is spelled with a U.
And everyone knows “Sophie” is the only reasonable name for a domicile.
Ok, she’s is whacked out, for real.Anyone follow her insta? It is a train wreck.
People would rather still focus on her past conservatorship and her father than what happening now.
I was glad when she finally turned off the comments. She lives in her own little world. No one’s home for anyone on the outside. I don’t think she needs to be under a conservatorship, or put in a psych hospital or any of that, but she def shouldn’t be in any romantic relationships or be responsible for children. Girl’s mental and emotional growth is hella stunted.
Sounds like she needs to see a man about a horse.
Soooooooo you had a divorce, of course of course, and no one enjoys a divorce, of course