Conner O’Malley, perhaps the comedy world’s most chaotic entity, has returned with a new nightmare that sets the absurdities of gentrification and the American Dream against the architectural eyesore that is New York City’s Hudson Yards.
It begins with a frantic, PS1-aping “video game” brought to us by “Lululemon Interactive.” O’Malley, complete with a kettlebell and a “kamboucha” meter, sprints through Hudson Yards, where he learns about the “secret level above Amazon Prime” and collects “Hello Points” that can be used to buy DVD copies of Bird Box. After roughly two minutes, O’Malley unlocks “allyship” and the clip’s last seven minutes devolve into a psychedelic fever dream set to Tool’s “Schism.” As O’Malley’s hunky digital avatar dances, mourns, and despairs over the McDonald’s arches, quotes from figures like Thomas Jefferson and Winston Churchill dissolve onto the screen.
“I find that the harder I work, the more luck i seem to have with the ladys [sic],” Jefferson “says.” Bruce Lee, meanwhile, is quoted as saying, “I am successful if I murder, take a human life.” Many of the quotes, actually, have to do with murder being an essential part of success. “I worked hard to get the chance to kill people with drones,” reads a “quote” from President Barack Obama. Iconic businessman Charles F. Kettering warns, “Keep on going, Keep running that mouth I will rip your jaw off [sic].”
Per the video’s credits, it was edited by Jack Bensinger and Cole Kush, with Kush, an Adult Swim alum, also providing the horrifying 3D graphics.
Watch it now before Tool yanks this thing.