It’s complicated for Billy Crystal and Tiffany Haddish in the awful dementia rom-com Here Today
Film Reviews Here Today
Note: The writer of this review watched Here Today on a digital screener from home. Before making the decision to see it—or any other film—in a movie theater, please consider the health risks involved. Here’s an interview on the matter with scientific experts.
A deadly combination of enfeebled comedy and maudlin melodrama, Here Today stars Billy Crystal (who also directed, in his first stint behind the camera since HBO’s 61*, 20 years ago) as Charlie Burnz, a legendary comedy writer who’s still vital enough to be on staff at a fictionalized version of Saturday Night Live. We know that Charlie’s still got the goods not because his jokes are particularly funny but because the movie stops cold early on to have a couple of the younger writers question his continuing relevance, only to be lectured by their producer about the wealth of experience that he brings to the show. Respect your elders, kids! Especially because, like Charlie, they may secretly be suffering from dementia. While the guy can toss off zingers with aplomb, he’s increasingly having trouble remembering which health club locker is his, or how to get to the studio, or even whether the person he’s talking to is his own adult son. Nobody else is aware, however, apart from Charlie’s neurologist (Anna Deavere Smith), who suspects that he may have Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease—incurably degenerative, and usually fatal within a year.
Julianne Moore won an Oscar just six years ago for playing a similar role, but Here Today isn’t that kind of sober drama, alternating instead between silly and sudsy. In a blatant attempt to attract younger viewers, the film pairs Crystal with Tiffany Haddish, whose character, Emma, improbably shows up for a lunch with Charlie that her ex-boyfriend had purchased in a charity auction. Despite not having a clue who this “old man” (as she constantly calls him) is, Emma speedily becomes… well, it’s bizarrely unclear just what she becomes. Crystal no doubt knows that audiences would cringe were Charlie and Emma to hook up; at the same time, though, he evidently wants to emphasize that it’s not totally implausible. So Emma moves into Charlie’s house, spoons him in bed, and more or less shrugs whenever she’s asked whether the two of them are romantically involved. Half of Here Today arguably qualifies as the first rom-com to be built around the concept of plausible deniability.
That half is just barely tolerable, thanks to Crystal’s still-sharp timing and Haddish’s occasional bursts of raucous energy. (“Your little frail body would not be able to handle all these groceries,” Emma tells Charlie at one point, gesturing to herself. If Haddish didn’t improvise that line, she at least successfully creates the impression that she did.) Everything involving Charlie’s dementia, however, pushes well past earnest into sickly sweet. The movie’s big set piece sees him berate a cast member during the show’s live broadcast, stepping before the camera to yell at the guy for constantly stressing the wrong syllable of commonplace words and famous names. This is evidently meant to be at once hilarious and troubling, but the meltdown—despite being cowritten, along with the rest of the screenplay, by Alan Zweibel, one of SNL’s original writers—never takes off comedically and seems oddly irrelevant to Charlie’s illness. While dementia can cause personality changes, the film never gets into that, nor are there other such instances; apart from forgetting things, Charlie always seems entirely himself, and this rant could easily have taken place 25 years earlier. Is he meant to have forgotten that the show is live? If so, that doesn’t come across.
Not content with the horrors of losing one’s memory and sense of self, Crystal and Zweibel additionally saddle Charlie with lingering guilt about the death, many years earlier, of his beloved wife, Carrie, requiring him to reconcile with his daughter (Laura Benanti) while he can still remember why she resents him. This superfluous subplot demands flashbacks, but rather than digitally de-age himself, or cast a young lookalike, Crystal opts to have poor Louisa Krause, as Carrie, perform all of her scenes directly to the camera, representing Charlie’s point of view—a strategy that reduces a talented actor to painful mugging. (Similarly ludicrous are as-themselves cameos by Sharon Stone and Kevin Kline, who appear at a retrospective screening of a hit comedy that Charlie wrote: When we see a clip from this imaginary film, which would have been shot decades earlier, their characters talk in a fully darkened room while wearing Halloween masks that cover 90% of their faces.) Here Today’s sincerity is matched only by its phoniness. The same was true of Crystal’s 1992 directorial debut, Mr. Saturday Night, so at least one can say he hasn’t lost a step.
79 Comments
“I’ll have what she’s having?”
I’d love a movie where Billy Crystal drifts from scene to scene frantically shouting his famous lines from other movies. Or, as the director might say, “Just act naturally.”
Coming this summer: Billy Crystal Crashes Movies.50 Shades Of Grey:Anastasia: “What are butt plugs?”Billy: “I’ll have what she’s having!”
Crystal is 31 years older than Haddish. Benanti is only a few months older than her, so his character is sleeping with a woman the same age as his daughter.
Hollywood: cut it out!
Yeah, the gap is just too much. Crystal should be an a relationship with someone closer his own age, like Gheorghe Muresan.
They should have called this movie My ‘Gina.
At least the age gap was intentional. I think its worse when a female lead is supposed to be only slightly younger or the same age as the male lead but the actress is significantly younger. A recent, hilarious example is Hobbs & Shaw in which Vanessa Kirby (33) is supposed to be Jason Statham’s (53) slightly younger sister (they’re shown in a flashback as kids, roughly the same age).
Huh. That trailer you guys posted the other day made it look so good.
Well, this may surprise you, but this guy’ ls opinion is not objective fact. Just because he didnt like it, does not magically mean that it definitely must be bad.
Meh. People over 45 will think it’s ‘simply mahvalous’!
I am over 45 and I will not think that.
No, me either.
I’m only 43, so I’m safe.
Dit. Toe.
Do you know anyone over 45?
Myself and other people.
Is anyone over 45?
Over 45 = old enough to get that reference, but not to lose all critical faculties, ffs.
If by this you mean people who were over 45 twenty years ago, and are still over 45, but are also over 65, you are correct.(I actually am still curious about seeing it because I find Crystal sort of interesting as a cornball who was once a pretty big star, but I fear Crystal’s days of being able to claim even a fortysomething fanbase are long gone.)
Yea, I have difficulty picturing anyone much younger than my parents getting excited enough about a new Billy Crystal movie to intentionally seek it out. My parents are 70.
People his age liked him in Soap and Princess Bride but thought it was mostly downhill after that. Although I liked City Slickers where he was kind of the straight man. Who knew Jack Palace could be funny.
I’m older than all you guys, and I wouldn’t get anywhere near this horse shit. But I love when people write “meh.” All the cool kids say it.
The past year and change I’ve been acting as a temporary caregiver to my mother with onset dementia while all this is going down. We both finally got our shots and I’m hoping to return home soon.But yeah. Over a year in a small house with an overprivileged dementia-ridden alcoholic who was married to a toxic narcissist for decades which means her conversational skills are limited to boasting of privilege and gaslighting.Somehow, I don’t think I’ll find this movie mahvalous…
I’m old enough to remember his one season on SNL with the Dream Team cast. I will not think that.
I’m over 45, just watched it and didn’t think that, but thanks for the gratuitous ageism!
Oof, when was the last time Haddish was in something that wasn’t embarrassingly bad? Girls Trip seems to be the one bright spot in her entire filmography. Guess she’s getting paid though so good for her.
I still don’t get the AV Club’s love for her. I’ve seen her in a handful of things and she’s… okay? She was reasonably good as a rage-monster in Eric Andre’s Bad Trip, but it was a deliberately one-note character. We also watched the first season of her “up and coming comics” anthology series They Ready; she’s only in it a little, to introduce each comic, but there wasn’t anything in her rudimentary presence to make me say “wow, I want to see more of this person.”
All due respect, you really don’t get the AV Club’s love for her? It’s 2021, and it’s an online discussion of pop culture.
Did you think I meant that I don’t understand the concept of the AV Club being in love with a particular entertainer? Of course I understand the concept. I just don’t get why they’re so high on Tiffany Haddish in particular. “It’s a pop culture website” doesn’t answer the question.
I’m saying that in 2021, on a website that wants to showcase its progressive outlook, the “optics” of overly praising Tiffany Haddish seem pretty simple to me. That’s not say I don’t think she’s funny at all, but it feels more than a little heavy-handed when sites like these go out of their way to act like she’s the second coming of comedy.
I guess I don’t get it. They’re constantly praising her only because she’s a black woman?
Probably unfair to say “only,” I just think that this is a pretty progressive group who likes everyone to see how progressive they are. On the margins, I’d guess that makes the praise more fulsome than it otherwise might be. Hardly the worst thing ever, but I don’t know that another comic with her extremely mixed (at best) track record would garner the kind of attention she does on sites like this.
“I don’t get the A.V. Club’s love for her,” say Concerned People about a popular comedian whose movies have received mixed-to-negative reviews from the A.V. Club.
Bad Trip (on Netflix, with Eric Andrew and Lil Rel Howery) is super funny, and she’s great in it. She’s also very good in The Last OG. But yeah, she’s been in a lot of crap.
i didn’t follow it all the way, but the last og was solid from what i saw, people seem to love tuca and bertie and the ike barinholtz sleeper ‘the oath’ was pretty good. i would say she has as good a movie career as most ‘comedy breakouts’ do – i.e. not great but there are some bright spots.
I remember enjoying the Lego movie sequel.
I liked her in that Ike Barinholz movie, but she didn’t get much to do.
If you count the second Lego Movie. she was great in that.
She walked away with every scene she in on The Carmichael Show. Enough so, a lot of people are waiting, looking for and hoping the magic will show again.
She does pretty good voiceover work including in Tuca and Bertie.I imagine your question also raises plenty of questions about the number, type and quality of women of color roles in comedy, but that’s probably not a conversation meant for the AV Club comments.
she seemed determined to usurp Kevin Hart as the “actor who is determined to be in every single movie for which he/she receives a script”. I get wanting to strike while the iron is hot but come on, leave some for everyone else.
Haddish is talented tho, it’s like McCarthy who is also extremely talented but ends up in a lot of bad roles, but probably a lot of good pay cheques. Or Sandler. Lots of comedians really.
Tuca & Bertie is pretty goddamn fantastic. So there’s that at least.
“When we see a clip from this imaginary film, which would have been shot decades earlier, their characters talk in a fully darkened room while wearing Halloween masks that cover 90% of their faces.”Am i missing something here? This sentence is written as if we should conclude that this is indeed stupid… but im not entirely certain why, or what the point is supposed to be regarding the age of the movie and the masks. That they covered their faces rather than paying to de-age them? That… doesnt actually seem like a bad idea to me?
That struck me as well. And, uh, this fake movie is supposed to be a comedy? That sounds absolutely terrifying!
I think the point that the reviewer is making is that it’s a waste to have two really talented actors in your movie, playing themselves, if the main reason you have them there requires you to create a flashback scene where you have to cover their faces and basically don’t allow them to do much beyond voicework.
Billy Crystal had his run. He’s pretty one note, and I say this as someone who saw Mr Saturday Night in the theaters, opening day. On purpose. I watched his HBO stand-up, his Comic Relief cavorting and capering, I watched his SNL years, and his Spinal Tap bit where he was both times raised up by the schtick- and mugging-free performance of Christopher Guest. I fucking sat through Running Scared. Didn’t watch Forget Paris, because, I have limits.
The point being, we have gotten the full Billy Crystal experience already. He’s made a ton of money, and doesn’t need to work anymore. Just…stop. Please? Please?
When I was little we had a TV connected to the VCR in one part of the basement and an older TV connected to the Super Nintendo in the other part of the basement. Sometimes in the evening my parents would watch a movie, and I’d play Super Nintendo to eavesdrop on the kinds of movies adults watching. “Forget Paris” made an impression on me because they used the F-word and my mom didn’t turn off the movie or scream in horror, which meant she’d heard that word before, which was mind-boggling to me. More importantly, there’s a scene where one of the characters says, “Forget Paris!” It gave me the impression for many years that in “grown-up” characters say the title out loud.
More importantly, there’s a scene where one of the characters says,
“Forget Paris!” It gave me the impression for many years that in “grown-up” characters say the title out loud. I love this!
Running Scared is goddamned national treasure.Not because of Crystal, but still.
It’s bc of Joey Pants and Gregory Hines. That guy had talent, and charisma!I will say that the line “His boss had an accident, he fell on a knife four times.” always stuck with me.
That, and Crystal always works best as part of pair. Takes the edge off the smarm.
You nailed it. I recently read one of his books and had to take breaks from the smarm. I love him in so many things. But it’s a love like you have for an uncle who can’t help making jokes, asides, and funny sounds all the time. Having that other person or group balances him out.
Running Scared is goddamned national treasure. I don’t know what it is about that movie, but I’ve seen it several times on purpose and can never change the channel if I stumble across it. It’s a generic 80’s buddy copy movie and it should be forgettable. Somehow it’s not. It’s probably the easy charisma of Crystal and Gregory Hines (who I think were friends in real life) and it could be the drop dead gorgeousness of Darlanne Fluegel. Or it could be Joe Pantoliano being Joe Pantoliano. The movie is inexplicably fun.
Yeah I’d credit Gregory Hines and the lived-in Chicago locations first.
LOL I still remember his line to Jimmy Smits (?) near the end when he was trying to sound tough…I think it was “if you hurt her you’ll never be dead enough.” even as a kid I remember thinking “how did he get that line out without cracking up immediately?” Still he and Gregory Hines had great chemistry, but it was pure 80’s crap.
I really like Running Scared.
Never much cared for him. Have never been a fan of popular comedies The Princess Bride or City Slickers or Analyze This. I’ll give him credit for a line he didn’t write in When Harry Met Sally, which goes something like: “When you find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you want the rest of your life to begin as soon as possible.” That’s some truth there and he delivered it well.Running Scared was kind of fun, so there’s also that.
counterpoint: He loves what he does and wants to continue doing it, ostensibly until he’s dead, and if you or anyone else doesn’t want to see him do it, don’t watch. I always wondered why great athletes like Jordan would play past their prime (not saying “Billy Crystal was the MJ of comedy” because that would be laughable) and then I realized, if they love it that much, then let the “powers that be” decide when he’s done. If he embarrasses himself and/or overstays his welcome and/or “tarnishes his legacy” it’s on him. I say this as someone who is extremely “meh” about Billy Crystal.
Guess we won’t have to wait that long?
I’m not even dragging you, I legit forgot that he did blackface like, a lot. Well, he asked for it, looks like he’s gonna get it.
LOL yeah I forgot he did blackface too. FWIW he definitely doesn’t have the stones to do blackface now (and as an aside, it’s interesting to hear so many older comedians like John Cleese of all people echoing these points). In fact I remember Billy Crystal on Soap playing a gay dude, which was “cutting edge” for the time (even though he never kissed anyone or did anything to suggest he was gay other than saying “I’m gay” maybe 3 times).
I literally laughed out loud at this line in the review:
“Half of Here Today arguably qualifies as the first rom-com to be built around the concept of plausible deniability.” Sounds like I probably wouldn’t do that at anything in the movie though.
Why are you still positing theater safety advice from August 2020? So much has changed since then. I think it’s time to revise it or get rid of it.
As much as I’m hoping my local fleapit opens in time to show Dune (or hell, re-open at all, I’m still not sure that’s actually gonna happen), I’m still not going to a theater showing this year unless the auditorium is mostly empty.
Dune and Shang Chi are making me seriously consider venturing in but honestly my hope is HBO Max runs Dune direct-to-video (is that still on the table?) and I’m willing to pay $25 or whatever to watch Shang Chi via D+ as a premium add-on. Most likely though if the only way I can see those films is in the theater then I’m just gonna have to wait til they stream.
I’m willing to pay $25 or whatever to watch Shang Chi via D+ as a premium add-on. I know what you mean, and I’m willing to do that for Shang-Chi and for Black Widow…. but man, I hope D+ comes up with some standard policy (I haven’t heard yet if they have) where it will cost extra for a few months then be normally accessible. I won’t want to wait to see those movies, but … it’s a lot of money for me with my not-giant television set.
We’re not out of the woods yet, don’t be so antsy.
On another note, I dislike all these movies doing the hollwood treatment to dementia. There is a reason they call it the long goodbye for a reason. There is no comedy period.
So I realize it’s not exactly the same thing, but this feels like someone watched the Larry & Loretta storyline on Curb Your Enthusiasm and said, “I can do that worse and with less laughs, but what if I add a disease that creates an ethical dilemma that I won’t really address?”
Right out of the gate, a movie wanting us to accept that a character is a brilliant comedian is always a red flag, because they’re never good enough within the move to justify it. Any kind of performer, really. I loved how Always Be My Maybe made one of the leads a famous chef, because we can’t actually judge how good the food is.
“Hey, you know what’s really funny and romantic?”“What?”“Dementia.”
I’m so glad you…dementioned it.
It’s not fun or funny.
But does Billy get an opportunity to remind us all how much he loves baseball?
My favorite joke from “the Larry Sanders Show” was when Artie said this: Billy Crystal would suck a cock to win a sack race.That’s all I’ve got.
Actually that quote is from a Rolling Stone article in 1994 and it specifically refers to that line being cut from the show. Cunty McCunt regrets the error.
That is correct, though the show makes a sly meta-reference to it in a later episode when Larry says, “As you know, I’d do anything to win a sack race.”
LOL when I saw the brief clip for this movie I naively thought “I’d watch 90 minutes of Billy Crystal and Tiffany Hadish just hanging out and riffing, I’ve been begging for some mindless funny escapist fare after the last year”…and so of course they have to make it nearly 2 hours of Billy terminally ill with dementia. JFC Hollywood, don’t you have another Airplane or Young Frankenstein in development anywhere?