Today in “Objectively awful things that somehow got transformed into comedy memes” news: Lifetime has announced a slate of new projects for its 2020 calendar today, including its latest Surviving limited series—this one centered on living convicted sex offender-turned-dead conspiracy theory fodder Jeffrey Epstein—and a biopic about domestic assault survivor-turned-national punchline Lorena Bobbitt.
Following in the footsteps of 2019's Jordan Peele-fronted documentary Lorena, I Am Lorena Bobbitt is executive produced by Bobbitt herself, and is, according to a press release, a document in which “Lorena tells her story, and hers alone, for the first time…from a wide-eyed, immigrant bride to a battered wife into an unlikely media sensation.” The film’s announcement comes as part of a serious and welcome re-evaluation of how the Bobbitt story was handled in the media back in the 1990s, moving away from the knee-jerk “Tee hee, woman cuts off husband’s penis” aspects, and focusing instead on the abuse and unhappiness that would lead to such a drastic turn of events.
The Epstein series, meanwhile comes in the wake of Lifetime’s Surviving R. Kelly and its planned sequel, and focuses on the high-profile financier who was convicted on charges of sex trafficking of minors in 2019. In the works since last year, the four-hour doc will examine the life of Epstein, and especially the ways he used his political and financial connections with numerous famous and powerful figures to shield himself from scrutiny. It will probably focus significantly less on the various conspiracy theories that have sprouted up around his death in prison late last year, although, hey, who knows, maybe they’ll throw the internet a bone.
I Am Lorena Bobbitt and Surviving Jeffrey Epstein are just two of several projects that Lifetime announced at the TCA’s this week; other series and films include five new films based on V.C. Andrews’ Ruby Landry series, and a new set of true-crime specials executive produced by former kidnapping victim Elizabeth Smart.
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Lifetime, once again cutting off more than they can chew………..
And yet they passed on my Tarantino-esque alternate history in which Lorena Bobbitt goes on a revenge spree against Epstein and his cohorts.
I’d watch at least half of that.
“Objectively awful things that somehow got transformed into comedy memes”
I know you write for the baby brain website, but can you at least try to pretend that adults can think something is serious and also make jokes about it?
This would carry more weight if you weren’t here reading the baby brained site. Sorry you hate your choices.
I am sickened nearly to death of these post-”Serial” self serious streaming service biopics.Wake me for the Lorena Bobbitt show where the first episode ends with Dean Norris as the severed penis singing a Gilbert and Sullivan-style number about his conflicting desires to run free through a corn field or be reattached to the body that grew him. Then he’s chased by police bloodhounds, captured, and packed on ice inside a giant Igloo cooler.The third episode could be about Dean Norris’s penis character auditioning for porn against three other hopeful penises portrayed by Michael Chiklis, Nick Searcy and that guy who plays the captain on SVU — and in the end everyone learns a valuable lesson about teamwork and gangbangs.
Wasn’t Jordan Peele attached to a Lorena Bobbit biopic?
Yeah, but he got cut off
I heard he got reattached, and was taking a bunch of different ideas and just attaching them together. Kind of a Franken-pic, if you will
About as much as John Bobbitt was attached to his nudger.
Will Surviving Jeffrey Epstein end on a cliffhanger?
This whole Epstein meme is a perfect summery of how after a while a dumb joke becomes truth to dumb people. What’s the difference between Epstein didn’t kill himself and jet fuel doesn’t melt steel beams? Far as I care they are just dumb jokes that just give away ignorance.