From left to right: Shin Megami Tensei II (Screenshot: YouTube), God Of War II (Image: Sony Interactive Entertainment), Scribblenauts Unlimited (Screenshot: 5th Cell)
God Of War Ragnarök arrives in stores today, allowing players to engage in an emotionally rich, beautifully drawn story about fatherhood, fate, and the natures of both redemption and war. It is also, as it happens, one of the most satisfying games ever made about the pleasure of beating the shit out of the gods, one of the primary pleasures of gaming for multiple decades now and counting.
Don’t believe us? All you have to do is look back over the history of the medium—and especially those games that have grown out of Japan’s most prominent role-playing developers—to see a long history of plucky heroes picking up a sword and doing their damnedest to plunge it into the Almighty’s face. Greek gods, Roman gods, totally fictitious gods, and even, yes, the Big Man—Mr. Judeo-Christian himself—have all gotten their teeth kicked in over the years by heroes wishing to have a polite word with The Management Of Reality.
In honor of Ragnarök’s release, then, let’s celebrate some of the best god-killings in gaming, starting with our favorite kill from The Ragin’ Spartan himself, Kratos, the God Of War.
The Sisters of Fate, God Of War II (2007)
God of War 2 Remastered - Sisters of Fate, Lahkesis and Atropos Boss Fight [PS3] 1080p
Although the modern incarnation of Kratos, from , and now , is at least trying to break his god-killing habit, the version in the franchise’s previous seven games was capable of no such restraint. As such, we’re kind of spoiled for choice here, with nemeses like Ares and Zeus both serving as easy picks. But if we have to go for a hands-down favorite, we’ll have to toss our choice to a trio of characters who aren’t technically gods, but who fill that role in the franchise perfectly well: The Sisters Of Fate. Defiance of fate is a common theme in the God Of War games, where characters can’t sneeze without it being the subject of some secretive prophecy that claims to guide their every step. Kratos makes his hatred of predestination very literal, though, in God Of War II, when he picks a fight with Clotho, Lahkesis, and Atropos, the mythical Fates, who object to his desire to steal their time machine-esque Loom Of Fate for vengeance-based business. The stand-out part of the fights against the Sisters is undeniably the battle with thread-cutter Atropos, who whisks Kratos back in time to the climax of the first God Of War, attempting to shatter a massive sword that past-Kratos used to overcome and kill the hated Ares, thus wiping both the past and present versions of the raging man-god out in one fell swoop. It’s a clever way to invoke the Fates’ control over past, present, and future—and an extremely satisfying victory once Kratos shatters her plans to shatter him.
Love a final fight that you can’t lose. (Miss me with “Jecht being the final battle”; if there’s something to follow it that the creators decide warrants the mechanics of battle, it’s not the final battle.)
It’s not the first time FF ended with an unlosable “battle”, but FFVII’s standoff between Cloud and Sephiroth only took a minute. (I played without guides on my first playthrough, so that was the first time I ever saw Omnislash. It was one of the most hilarious overkills in memory.)FFX’s final battle, on the other hand, is interminable, especially if you got all the summons.
In my experience, more often it’s something that has/claims to have the power of a god, not usually an actual god. But maybe I just haven’t played enough JRPGs
Maybe we’ve paid very different jRPGs, but I don’t think I’ve ever encountered anything fitting that bill. Closest might be the Walmarket sequence in FFVII
I’ll be honest: before I started doing work on myself and acknowledging the hurt I had caused in the pocket pet community, I had ONE god: sunflower seeds. I would stand up on my hindlegs and stretch and leap for one of those things. Christ, they’re like crack, but with higher cholesterol.
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Least satisfying deity kill: Yu Yevon in Final Fantasy X.
Love a final fight that you can’t lose. (Miss me with “Jecht being the final battle”; if there’s something to follow it that the creators decide warrants the mechanics of battle, it’s not the final battle.)
It’s not the first time FF ended with an unlosable “battle”, but FFVII’s standoff between Cloud and Sephiroth only took a minute. (I played without guides on my first playthrough, so that was the first time I ever saw Omnislash. It was one of the most hilarious overkills in memory.)FFX’s final battle, on the other hand, is interminable, especially if you got all the summons.
I hadn’t read any guides and accidentally one-hit Jecht with yojimbo
Isn’t killing God the plot of like 90% of all JRPGs
In my experience, more often it’s something that has/claims to have the power of a god, not usually an actual god. But maybe I just haven’t played enough JRPGs
And 10% rape fantasy
Maybe we’ve paid very different jRPGs, but I don’t think I’ve ever encountered anything fitting that bill. Closest might be the Walmarket sequence in FFVII
I’ll be honest: before I started doing work on myself and acknowledging the hurt I had caused in the pocket pet community, I had ONE god: sunflower seeds. I would stand up on my hindlegs and stretch and leap for one of those things. Christ, they’re like crack, but with higher cholesterol.
Sekiro’s Snake God deserves an honorable mention, but its Mist Noble deserves top marks.
Killing Hades in Hades, surely.
I’m not sure which slide it’s on, but you mispelled Kefka.
What, no Hades? I know it doesn’t stick, but still.
Someone sure missed out on the episode DLC in Asura’s Wrath. Pound for pounding best time Ive had making a god eat teeth
I vote for GoW3 when Kratos rips off Helios’ head and uses it as a lantern.
Nothing more satisfying than ripping Helios’s head off in God of War 3. That would be my favourite.
But don’t believe Gwyn should be on the list. There’s nothing satisfying about killing him, he’s nothing more than the husk of a god at this point.
I found a flaw in the Mac Version of Ultima 3 that enabled me to kill Lord British!