Nicole Kidman doesn’t inspire confidence as much as giggles in the Nine Perfect Strangers premiere
Nicole Kidman and David E. Kelley and may have gone a limited series too far here
TV Reviews Strangers
Across the board, self-improvement appears to be a noble and admirable quest; the vast majority of us recognize that we have an area or two (or more) that we should probably work on, if we could just find the time and/or energy. In Nine Perfect Strangers, several searching souls alight on an extravagant idyllic retreat called Tranquillum, run by an enigmatic Russian guru named Masha. She offers them total transformation—but at what price?
David E. Kelley, Liane Moriarty, and Nicole Kidman have already offered us a prestige miniseries exposing the tamped-down problems of privileged people: HBO’s multiple Emmy-winning Big Little Lies. Like BLL’s ill-advised second season, Nine Perfect Strangers isn’t quite as successful; the creators may have gone for one too many miniseries with this one, especially on the heels of Kelley and Kidman’s The Undoing on HBO last year. NPS moves the cast of characters from wealthy grade-school moms to the titular group of spa attendees, who all have their own mysterious backstories and different goals they’re striving for.
Perhaps that group jelled better on paper (full disclosure: I’ve read the book) but for some reason onscreen this group so far is jarringly disparate, which makes for a tough watch even though that is likely the story’s intention. Luckily, the acting roster is stellar, which helps draw us in just like the tranquil music and whatever the hell is in all of those smoothies (that is some ominous blender footage that opens the episode). With so many characters, the first episode mainly functions as place-setting and to stoke anticipation for what’s ahead. Even in this crowded, talented field, Michael Shannon stands out as Napoleon, the self-described “loquacious” husband and father who just wants his family (Asher Keddie as his wife Heather and Grace Van Patten as daughter Zoe) to be happy, even when it’s obvious that they’re anything but. Melissa McCarthy can even make the most of a non-charming character like Frances, who is undeniably rude to admirers like Carmel, played by a nearly unrecognizable Regina Hall against her usually glamorous self. Frances is obviously headed toward a love match with her current sparring parter Tony (Bobby Cannavale, partner of McCarthy’s frequent co-star Rose Byrne), as they first encounter each other in a meet-cute that wouldn’t even pass muster on most rom-coms. Also along for the ride are prosperous young couple Ben (Melvin Gregg) and Jessica (Samara Weaving), and Lars (Luke Evans), who’s an apparent narcissist just dumped by his boyfriend.
The cast almost seems as bewildered as their characters, thrust as they are into this beatific place with ominous undertones. It’s unfortunate that they all get off on the wrong foot with each other nearly across the board, from Carmel’s awkward run-ins with Frances, Tony, and Lars to Frances’ well-intentioned but wrongly received compliment of the Marconi family (“Why would you say that?”). There was absolutely no reason for Tony to honk his horn so obnoxiously at a supposedly peaceful retreat, except to place him immediately on Ben’s bad side. At least Lars and Zoe have taken tentative steps toward an actual friendship, and there’s no way that Leon doesn’t wind up winning everyone over due to his inherent goofiness.
Nevertheless, they’re all at Tranquillum hopefully headed toward that aforementioned self-improvement, steered by the mysterious Masha. As our transformation guru, though, Nicole Kidman doesn’t inspire confidence as much as giggles this episode, what with her strange wandering accent (supposedly Russian) and her latest voluminous hair carpet (see also: Celeste’s strawberry blondeness on Big Little Lies and Grace’s cascade of red curls on The Undoing). Masha does introduce an appropriate sense of menace, promising a much more challenging journey than any of the nine were expecting. So apparently this fractured—although apparently carefully curated—group will need to come together eventually: cut off from the outside world (it’s kind of funny how much panic losing their phones incites in people), and having signed over apparent property and biological rights (those blood draws!), they are now at the mercy of Masha, who quickly transforms from guru to possible villain as the episode draws to a close.
Stray observations
- Welcome to Nine Perfect Strangers’ episodic coverage everyone! I’ll also be dropping reviews for the second and third episode today, then weekly as Hulu releases new episodes. Little uncertain about where this journey intends to take us, but like Napoleon, glad to be on board. If you have read the book, though, please keep this space spoiler-free for those who have not!
- To that end, I watched the first episode with a friend who hadn’t read the book: She was immediately intrigued by Masha’s “I’m going to fuck with all of you” cliffhanger line that ended the episode, and wanted to watch the second one immediately.
- Fun to see Manny Jacinto on here as Masha’s minion Yao, apparently the one who saved her life all those years ago. It’s still so hard not to just think of him as Jason on The Good Place though.
- Perhaps the most awkward moment in an episode fulled with awkward moments was poor Michael Shannon having to yell out “Napoleon!” and having Melissa McCarthy respond “Genghis Khan!” Who just yells out their name to introduce themselves? Was it supposed to be funny? If so, it landed with a distinct thud.
- This Frances line about Masha was pretty great, though: “She’s like this amazing, mystical Eastern Bloc unicorn… see what I mean?”
- At the top of the Nine Perfect Strangers list this episode: Heather, who’s actually brave enough to stand up against Masha.
32 Comments
yay can’t wait! White Lotus was one of the better shows in years but mostly has left me sad realizing that shitting in suitcases is sometimes the only tool we have to fight the elite, I’m ready for some campy summer Kidman to distract me!
Imagine thinking the deranged drug addict spiraling out of control was the hero.
So excited to hear that not only is there a new Perfect Strangers show, but apparently there are nine of them now! So with Manny Jacinto, is the idea that Balki is a Filipino rather than Eastern European? Can’t wait to see his “dance of joy”!
Don’t be ridiculous.
“Cousins Larry!”
I’m in wait-and-see mode on this one. I’ve been burned by the Kelley/Kidman combo one too many times, what with Big Little Lies season 2 and The Undoing. Both were hot messes (and not in the good way), largely due to Kelley’s disjointed writing. Until David E. Kelley can prove that he can bring a coherent narrative in for a landing, I’m out.
Did you watch the first season of David Kelley’s Big Sky? So many WTF illogical moments, so many throwing stuff at the TV moments.
Nope, didn’t. Actually didn’t know that was a David E. Kelley show. All the more reason to avoid it, I suppose.
Yeah I’ll probably background watch this while cleaning or something but I have no confidence in David E. Kelley, he seems good at delivering compelling and stylish initial episodes then just half-asses the rest. Maybe he’s so respected nobody wants to challenge him? The Undoing especially was just such an incredible waste of time.
I saw the trailer for this, and my eyes rolled so hard and so many times that I got a huge headache.
Why? Just curious.
Even in this crowded, talented field, Michael Shannon stands out Naturally! I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him fail to stand out.
It’s such a different character for him, too!
Don’t get me wrong, I love Liane Moriarty’s rich white Aussie’s dealing with issues of the day books as much as I love Elin Hildebrandt rich white Nantucketers dealing with the issues of the day books. But the series of BLL was so, so, soooo far above the quality level of the book of BLL and BLL was a much better book than NPS I think it would take Paddy Chayefsky to whip this material into prestige territory.They should have done What Alice Forgot instead.
Having seen the first three eps of this, I can confidently say that we are 2 for 2 on the shows being better than the books when it comes to Liane Moriarty. I wish I could quit her!And yes, I’ve wondered why they haven’t done What Alice Forgot. Intrigue, sex and fancy school PTAs, what’s not to like!
man, I wasn’t very high on Nine Perfect Strangers the book, but figured Big Little Lies made such a good show that this adaptation could be good too. I could not get through this first ep.
There needs to be a genre name for this type of show (BLL, White Lotus, etc.) in which the settings are glam while the storylines (ostensibly) tackle the ugly underbelly of society. It’s the carrot/stick approach to storytelling. You can oooh about the views and clothes (carrot) while cringing at the class and race themes being raised (stick).
Hmm, I felt much more positively to it. (Although I’m sort of thinking of the three episodes as a whole, I suppose) I too have read the book and found it absolutely ridiculous and batshit crazy, so basically I came in with very, very, VERY low expectations.I was surprised that they aren’t really seeming to hold back any of the mysteries or twist. I don’t remember the Marconis talking about Zach until much later in the book, for instance.I thought Samara Weaving made a great Jessica. She’s got such good comic timing in general but she nailed the character. And Melissa McCartney is always a pleasure. Watching her and Bobby Carnivale snip at each other is great.My main complaint? Who the hell okayed that terrible goatee covering up part of Manny Jacinto’s beautiful face?
I’m liking it, this show knows it’s a summer show and leans into the silliness.
Exactly. I don’t think it’s trying to be Big Little Lies here. It’s a summer show on a streaming platform. Not everything needs to be intense.
I’m a bit torn. I have no use for the show’s premise, but that is one seriously stacked cast.
This feels like the gone-mad-sequel of Joanna Eberhart*.*last known residence: Stepford
“and there’s no way that Leon doesn’t wind up winning everyone over due to his inherent goofiness.”Who’s Leon??
Napoleon. (I had the same question)
It’s still so hard not to just think of him as Jason on The Good Place though.I had this problem in Brand New Cherry Flavor. Probably didn’t help that “Code” was basically the gritty drama version of Jason.
I’d just be waiting for him to yell “BORTLES!” in every scene.
tbh there was a very brief moment where I couldn’t remember his Good Place name (watched the series in real time as the new seasons came out) and “Blake Bortles” was the first name my brain supplied
I’m sorry, but a list of terrible wigs Nicole Kidman has worn that doesn’t mention the one she had in ‘Aquaman’ is woefully incomplete.
The Undoing was already one limited series too far; that was horrible
Why was BLL’s second season “ill-advised”? Seems like an odd way to describe it.
I’m growing more and more irritated by Nicole Kidman’s “acting”. In closeups,she pouts and simpers as if she’s spent hours in front of a mirror or her cellphone camera trying out various facial and eye expressions to see which ones make her look best.I find it very difficult to watch her self-conscious performances.