Taco Bell hires currently-chaotic celebrity Pete Davidson to apologize for their formerly-chaotic breakfast menu
"Sometimes, we go too far," Pete Davidson asserts on behalf of both himself and Taco Bell
Aux News Pete Davidson
Pete Davidson is not exactly known for his sincere remorse. He’s appeared in some middling-to-bad movies. He missed a bunch of episodes of the show that gave him the ability to be in those movies. He branded Kim Kardashian’s name on his chest. However, he’s now taking some accountability for taking things too far—in a branded way, of course.
An unlikely source has apparently seen a kindred spirit in the man who once taught Ariana Grande about either love, patience, or pain (did we ever figure out which?)–and now, together, they’ve decided to enter a simpler, healthier era.
For once, this new partner isn’t an extremely famous and beautiful star (or Joe Pesci, for that matter). It’s Taco Bell, and they’ve decided to enlist Davidson to help them embark on an A.M. apology tour.
“Sometimes, we go too far. I have, and that’s why Taco Bell has hired me to make an apology for them,” says Davidson in the ad (while clad in a convenient ex-girlfriend-tattoo-covering gray sweatshirt). “Taco Bell went a bit crazy with its breakfast,” he continues. “It was too much!”
This is, of course, a reference to previous Davidson-esque offerings such as the Naked Egg Taco or the late, great Waffle Taco. “We honestly over-innovated in breakfast,” said Sean Tresvant, Taco Bell’s chief brand officer, in an interview with CNN. “When you look at today’s consumer and the [fast food] breakfast business, it’s about familiarity and it’s about comfort.”
Now, you can truly start your day right with offerings such as the Bell Breakfast Box, a 1040-1320-calorie option including a medium Baja Blast, breakfast Crunchwrap, and two cream-filled cinnamon donut holes, or a Grande Toasted Breakfast Burrito, which feels incredibly on-brand for the new spokesperson. Those pesky exes really do follow him around everywhere, huh?
64 Comments
Make me feel bad for liking the AM Crunchwrap. Shame me. Strike me down. Give me all the ridicule. I want it. I deserve it.
Yeah, you’re a fucking NAUGHTY morning fast food consumer, aren’t you?
You may call me “Ms. Jackson”.
Lately I’ve been making myself breakfast nachos (literally just nachos with some salsa and scrambled eggs on top), so you’ll get no judgement from me.
Those are called chilaquiles and they’re amazing.
That’s not really what chilaquiles are at all. Really just “fried tortilla with stuff on it” is all they have in common
I make chilaquiles / migas too sometimes, this is literally some bagged tortilla chips from the store with melted cheese, salsa and some scrambled eggs dumped on top… I can’t in good faith call them chilaquiles!
The bacon AM crunchwrap is phenomenal.
I’LL STAND WITH YOU!
I tried Taco Bell’s breakfast menu three or four times shortly after it was introduced, and ran into the same issue every time: the eggs tasted off. Maybe it’s because, since my parents have a small flock of chickens, I’m used to fresh eggs; whatever the reason, I just never could get into the Bell’s AM offerings.
Oh yeah they are 100% some Sysco liquid eggs out of a milk carton for sure.
I dunno, I’ve never actually eaten it, but those descriptions sound exactly like what I’d expect “Taco Bell breakfast” to be.
I thought all the stealth fast food ads were supposed to be posted at The Takeout. Pete Davidson doesn’t have enough cultural clout to bring this over here, unless he’s unveiling Taco Bell’s new footlong burrito. And even then, that should probably land it on Jezebel.
Unveiling his footlong burrito” could result in indecent exposure charges.
Word is there’s something footlong about Pete Anderson, but I don’t think it’s a burrito.
Mr. Anderson from The Matrix?
His hands make that Crunchwrap look so small in the header image. They should have gotten Trump instead. Bonus points for him saying “Sometimes we go too far…”
Aw, I’d forgotten about his little tiny paw-paws.
I mean, like it or not, Pete Davidson is relevant culturally.
Don’t worry, they will too. There’s probably someone two cubicles over getting ready to post the same story to Gizmodo.
This stuff doesn’t sound any worse than the shit we served when I worked there in the late 90’s. Especially the sausage, which looked like rabbit food when it was uncooked and stunk so nauseatingly when you cooked it nobody with a hangover was allowed to prep it.Actually, now that I think about it, it looked like rabbit food after it was cooked also, just darker and greasier.
I did not hate him in this commercial, for the first time ever. Weird
I just watched Bodies Bodies Bodies and he’s perfectly cast as an amazing douche. Highly recommend if you enjoy horror or can’t stand Pete Davidson.
I would’ve enjoyed that movie a lot more if its fairly interesting concept wasn’t so tightly wrapped around how inherently fucking irritating Zoomers are. It’s like Murder By Death, except nobody’s funny..
Would Zoomers even get your Murder By Death reference? Would millennials get it? I mentioned Norma Rae in a work meeting and one of my Gen Z colleagues had to Google it.
Not my fault they don’t know their references. I can’t even imagine how badly some of them would be offended by some of the stuff in MBD, anyway. And that’s just Peter Sellers’ character alone.“Say your goddamn pronouns!”I shudder to think.
The Breakfast Crunchwrap is in the HOF of fast food items. It’s the best breakfast fast food item on the market today and I will fight anyone who says otherwise. Also disappointed that the waffle taco is dead.
Man I actually liked the Naked Egg Taco. I guess we aren’t getting it back.
I usually get the breakfast crunchwrap. It’s fine. But Taco Bell desperately needs some sides for breakfast – the cinnabon bites don’t count. And I don’t want a hash brown since I already have one in the crunchwrap. Maybe, I don’t know, hear me out, some potatoes?
Also, why is bacon available at breakfast but not other times of the day???????
They should just make the cheesy potatoes an all day item.
“I don’t want a hash brown since I already have one in the crunchwrap. Maybe, I don’t know, hear me out, some potatoes?”Yo dawg, I heard you like potatoes…
But Taco Bell desperately needs some sides for breakfast – the cinnabon bites don’t count.You sound like my 5-year-old niece when she wanted to know what she could have for dessert after breakfast.My blanket statement of “How about you try eating some fruit, you fat fucking piece of shit?” goes to everyone in these comments and everyone on the planet who thinks rolling through a drive-through at 7 AM for a hearty deep-fried breakfast is a good idea. Christ, just pull up around back and ask if they’ll sell you a bucket of used lard. Maybe they’ll wrap it in a fried egg for ya for an extra nickel..
Hey man, can I suggest you check your blood sugar and maybe go eat a hamburger because you are unreasonably angry at people just wanting to enjoy food.
Hey man, I ate an apple. I’m good. When your heart explodes at 45, you’ll wish you had too.There was a time where I would’ve been surprised to see AVC peddling this greasy dogshit as ‘food’. That time is clearly long past..
Comment-username synergy.
Right back at ya. Minus the electric part..
Oh, it’s “I know you are but what am I”! So fun, I remember that from kindergarten!
I know you hang around kindergartens a lot, so I’m not surprised.
I have young kids, so yeah, actually. Hence my ability to recognize childish schoolyard taunts.
I’m not really interested in who or what you currently have locked in your basement, but sure, continue defending yourself to a stranger for no reason. I’m absolutely riveted.
Yet you knew I was often around a kindergarten, which given the fact I don’t use my real name on here, you’d have had to do some pretty deep sleuthing to find that out, which tells me that you are more interested in my life than a rando on the internet ought to be, which is, needless to say, weird. And so on that note, I don’t really make a habit of talking to stalkers, so you can carry on this conversation by yourself. I won’t be reading anymore of it.
Oh, look at you turning the tables! I’m impressed. You should go downstairs and have all those children dying a slow death in your basement explain the internet to you. Hello to you as you read more of this!
That’s kind of why I avoid Taco Bell in general. I mean nowadays I don’t eat much fast food, but in the past it was only the Mexican pizza (which I’m glad is back). They don’t have appropriate sides for just tacos or the other entrees.
Taco Bell’s breakfast is incredible. While I miss the toasted hashbrown breakfast burrito, I’ve just changed to a crunchwrap, with intentions of trying the breakfast quesadilla soon
Meta! Just as I started writing this comment, the commercial came on!Anyhoo, back to my original comment:
I tried Taco Bell breakfast when it first started (because I am an unapologetic TB fan!) and I was horribly disappointed. There are so many great mexican (little “m” because it’s not really) breakfasts they could have tried, but it was just a weird mishmash of their usual items with egg.
I actually really like Taco Bell breakfast.
He is kind of a chihuahua of a human being, isn’t he?
A sexy chihuahua, if women are to be believed.
A chihuahua with a huge dick.
Some friends and I had a convo about this. It’s not that he’s particularly sexy. It’s that he seems helpless and in need of saving. We ladies love a good fixer-upper…until we’ve had one. Those of us who have already had a fixer-upper do not find him attractive because we know what that looks like after the fun has worn off.
Nothing says quality food like Pete Davidson apologizing for it.
But Pete Davidson apologizing for your food definitely says “Taco Bell.”
I never understood the appeal of Taco Bell for any meal. Even at 2 am after drinking all night. I feel like there are better all night options
Back in the day, I think price (and consumer age) had a lot to do with it. When TB had the $.59, $.79, $.99 options, you could get a lot of food for a little bit of money. I’m with you on other options, though – in college, Waffle House was our go-to. In my early-mid 30’s, it was Krystal. Now I just hope I don’t have to get up and pee more than once in the middle of the night.
There used to be, but where I am COVID either drove a lot of the late night spots out of business or the ones that survived can’t get enough staff to work those hours. Now the best you’re going to do after 10PM is a major fast food chain drive-thru, and even then you will wait 15 minutes for your order because only two people are on that shift.
There didn’t used to be better all-night options, not outside of huge cities. Though when I went to college the Wendy’s nearby stayed open til 4am, so that was nice.
You are probably rightI grew up in the new west Chicago Suburbs and within two blocks off Cermak road there was a Taco Bell, Mr Sub and a White Castle that were all 24 hours. I have this really fond memory after working an all night inventory, sitting at the outside tables at Mr Sub and watching the sun rise. In college, nothing was 24×7 but pretty much everything by the bars was open an hour passed last call, so you could grab something on your walk back to the dorms
“We’ve realized that our business model depends on our customers being very drunk before eating our food and apparently that type of consumer is not out looking for breakfast first thing in the morning. We thought a hangover would be sufficient but that proved to be false. So now we’re serving alcohol at 6AM, local regulations be damned! Under the Bell there are no laws!”
“that type of consumer is not out looking for breakfast first thing in the morning”Only because for the very drunk it’s last thing at night.
You’ve got to give it to Taco Bell and Jack in the Box, they know how to speak to their people. TB markets to the frat bro beer pongers and Jack markets goes for the stoners.
This reads like TMZ or random clickbait article, not your usually quality…c’mon avclub, don’t make me ban you from my Google feed
I miss the Taco Bell bell
“We honestly over-innovated in breakfast,” These are the words I’ve been looking for regarding pizza. Off topic, but pizza places are doing too much. Just make pizza. People like pizza. You don’t need to stuff the crust, or make pull-apart crust, or invent all manner of sandwiches. Calm down./unrelated rant