Please enjoy this soothing footage of a migrating herd of wild air mattresses
Aux Features Mattresses
In the elevated high plains of Denver, CO, just east of the foothills of the mighty Rocky Mountains, a man named Robb Manes captured a rare and stunning sight: a herd of mattresses, bouncing and bounding and flopping their way across the steppe.
The mattresses had gathered for last weekend’s “Bed Cinema,” an outdoor movie festival that’s what it sounds like, when the inflatable sleeping surfaces, reacting to the gusts of a brewing storm or perhaps spooked by a predator, set out for a new space to graze. The mattresses, my friend, were blowin’ in the wind.
“We were hanging out at the pool when, suddenly, a mattress flew into the fenced-in area,” wrote Manes in the description of his video. “When a second and third one came in, we stood up, I grabbed my camera, and this is what we saw.”
As they are wont to do, people on the internet have since remixed the original footage with a bunch of movies like Jurassic Park and Braveheart and also added in Enya’s “Orinoco Flow” for good measure.
These lucky folks in Denver might have been anticipating seeing a movie, but instead they got to see the greatest show on Earth: the animal kingdom.
32 Comments
This is precisely why I exclusively use waterbeds when watching outdoor movies.
That’s pee and we all know it.
Who doesn’t drink at outdoor movies? It’s convenient.
All I said was we need a mattress for Courtney Love.
wow, how majestic
Free-range mattresses, as nature intended. Nice.
Nice.
“No one really knows what mattresses are meant to gain from their lives either. They are large, friendly, pocket-sprung creatures which live quiet private lives in the marshes of Squornshellous Zeta. Many of them get caught, slaughtered, dried out, shipped out and slept on. None of them seem to mind and all of them are called Zem.The mattress flolloped around. This is a thing that only live mattresses in swamps are able to do, which is why the word is not in more common usage. It flolloped in a sympathetic sort of way, moving a fairish body of water as it did so. It blew a few bubbles up through the water engagingly. Its blue and white stripes glistened briefly in a sudden feeble ray of sun that had unexpectedly made it through the mist, causing the creature to bask momentarily.”
When they mate, they do so on piles of humans.
I think I saw that on Inter-dimensional Cable III.
Don’t we all?
Many years ago I dated a gal who was an RA in a dormitory. One spring night she managed to get a key to the roof of the building so we went up with a blanket, pillows and cooler. While lying on our backs she turned to pull a drink out of the cooler and I saw, for a moment, what appeared to be a regular bed mattress float above us into the dark. It was such a bizarre, brief sight I didn’t even mention it to the girl. I’m sure it must have been an air mattress that a student who, for some reason, had a tank of helium and used it to fill the mattress and then released it. Still it was, for one brief, wonderful moment, a perfectly surreal experience.
I think it was Aliens. Or Angela Lansbury and some kids.
“They do move in herds.”Dead. That killed me. Also, the good place has Kinja!
What you might now know, is that viewing such migrations used to be commonplace in the Rockies, as well as on the plains. Herds of mattress roamed carefree until the advent of rail travel, and the hunting of mattresses for sport. Pillowtop Pete was rumored to have shot 60 of them in one day, the dying air of these mattresses flowing out with the overwhelming scent of rubber and talcum.This stunning video capture shows preservationist’s recent attempts to introduce these noble creatures back to their habitats has been working. Unfortunately, their encroachment on sub-urban, and even urban spaces conflict with the human denizens of these places. This combined with limited enforcement of hunting these beasts from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service means that such sightings will continue to be rare.
I’ve read of these sad dwindling numbers in herds. Some places are barely a few back-rests much less a few international-flight neck pillows to be found cowering behind some scraggling rocks. It’s sad really.
Read this in Sir David Attenborough’s voice. Fantastic.
Marlon Perkins voice. Better.
Okay let me turn on my Herzog voice“Nature it is said, is a heartless bitch. She feeds us from her warm teet but then casts us aside when she angers. These mattresses know this struggle. Their migration is both beautiful and frightening. Rarely does man see this beautiful site as these creature are frighten by the our presence. In the end some will be caught, deflated and successfully folded up and put back into their tight storage bags. Many more will be rolled up into a half assed ball and thrown in the back of our cars. Some still will find they have been punctured and throw out, because patches work for shit. They will all die in the end, and so will you”
Uh oh! Joan Collins must be in town!
Fleet’s In!
I am hesitant to say this, because I don’t want to encourage it, but… Great Job Internet!
It made me think of the parade in Paprika.
And Johnny Carson said: “Well, ishin’t that shumthin…”
I love the guy doing the “running with the bulls” in amongst them … as if he could somehow save a mattress or two from it’s ultimate fate of falling off a cliff like a Head Smashed In Buffalo Jump.
Personally, I think it’s heartening that these misunderstood creatures are being successfully relocated from their native habitat on Squornshellous Zeta.
I wasn’t expecting so find the footage so graceful, almost poetic.
I haven’t seen Braveheart in years, but what the fuck was Mel Gibson waiting for? ‘HOLD! HOLD! HOLD! HOLD!’Dude, just go! It’s a war! What were you waiting for, to see if they were Jewish? Get in the game, boozy!
Just makes me think of that umbrellas video from years back:
Now that’s what I call bedlam!
They’re beautiful!!!!
Needs the music from “Chariots of Fire”……