Boy, Richard Madden sure wants you think he’s the next James Bond
The Citadel star posted a video sipping a martini, but what could that possibly mean?
Aux News Madden
Recently, Richard Madden—who we still think of as being from Game Of Thrones even though the Red Wedding aired a whole-ass decade ago and he just lit up the box office in 2021 as one of the Eternals—posted an Instagram video with his new Citadel co-star Stanley Tucci in which the two of them semi-silently sip shaken-not-stirred martinis and try to suppress little giggles. We don’t know for sure what The Point of it is, but it’s extremely clear what Madden wants us all to think The Point of it is: that’s he’s going to be the next James Bond.
Now, this is of course very silly. After all the hype and the stories about how they’re not going to choose this kind of person and they’re not going to choose that kind of person, it would be weird if they let Richard Madden spoil the announcement on Instagram with Stanley Tucci. They’ll do it like when they announce the new Doctor Who, with a big press release, or like when there’s a new Pope, with colored smoke coming out of the chimney of longtime producer Barbara Broccoli’s house.
The far more likely explanation is that they’re playing everybody so that people like us and people like Deadline will write stories saying “Is Richard Madden the new James Bond???” either to get fans talking about it and give him an edge in the actual casting or they’re tricking fans into getting excited about the idea of Richard Madden playing a spy so they’ll tune in to Citadel—the new Prime Video show where Richard Madden plays a spy. “Jk, everybody. I’m not the new James Bond. But I appreciate all the support, and now you should tune in to watch Citadel!”
Why else would Stanley Tucci be there? Why does it seem so awkward and off-the-cuff? It’s just two dudes having a laugh, that’s not how you announce the new James Bond. (As always, we reserve the right to edit this story later to make it clear we were joking in the event that Richard Madden is cast as the next James Bond.)
70 Comments
“he just lit up the box office in 2021 as one of the Eternals”lol
I read that and was like, “But did he?” No, he did not, because the movie didn’t light up the box office. It lost money by my estimation, and flopped with critics.
I suppose he “lit up the box office” in the sense that he was in a film and the film was played and his image was literally projected as light onto a screen?
The light was from the flames in the dumpster that was The Eternals’ run in the theatres.
Yes, but if we’re going to pick that nit, that would light up the auditorium, while the box office itself would remain shrouded in darkness.
He lit it up like Antonio Banderas in The 13th Warrior!
All in all, it is a bit shocking that Hollywood got out of the adapting Beowulf for theaters business after the Jolie CG one.
He lit it up like Antonio Banderas in The 13th Warrior!Except that movie was entertaining.
Should’ve stuck with the original title, though.
I really don’t understand the hate for that movie. Is it some uber-high-brow historical epic, like, say, the Roadshow version of Kingdom Of Heaven? No. Is it some piece of godawful third-rate, Seagal-esque dross? Absolutely not, yet that’s what it’s treated as. Critics treated it as if it were made by the bastard son of Tommy Wiseau and whoever produces those movies you used to find on DVDs in gas stations. It’s great, and even clever in ways. Banderas learning the language. The variety of Nords in it. The idea that the enemy are Neanderthal holdouts.It’s a pretty damn good film. No, I didn’t expect it to get an Oscar, but I don’t think it deserves the hate it gets.
I love that damn movie. lol So much. Yea! They do call to me! And bid me take my place among them! IN THE HALLS OF VALHALLA! WHERE THE DEAD! SHALL LIVE! *forever.*I need help, I know.
Great movie!
There are worse choices. Like reading this article. That was a bad choice
I mean, the clues are all there:The martinis
Stanley Tucci is bald like BlofeldCitadel was a cut multiplayer level from GoldenEye 007Uhh, I’ll bet those curtains behind them were probably in Diamonds are Forever…
They are sitting at a table. Every James Bond movie has featured at least one table.
Can confirm. Am Table, was in Casino Royale.
I’m a fan of your work!
LotionChowder’s a table, Nilus is a fan… where’s Chairface when you need him?
And Peter Sellers sat on her?
The Broccolis insist on it!
Tables were on strike during Quantum of Solace. They had to improvise with a counter-top.
You’re just going to overlook Bond’s signature white t-shirt?
JAMES BOND IS NOT AUBURN. ILLEGTIMATE! ILLEGITIMATE!
Boy, Sam Barsanti really wants you think he’s witty.
He chokes up after drinking the martini, if even a martini is too strong for this guy, he is not gonna be the right man.
How am I the first commentator pointing out the typo in the headline?
Look at headline, AV Club!
I mean, that has to be the only meaning. It’s not like martinis are incredibly popular cocktails that millions of people who do not portray James Bond enjoy!
Indeed, it’s not as though Stanley Tucci in particular is well-known for shaking cocktails that are not normally shaken!
(It’s weird that anyone is specifically known for that, but here we are!)
“Tucci, did you shake this goddamn White Russian?”
My Aston Martin has a Creedence tape stuck in the deck!
For that matter, those are not martini glasses.
Martini glasses and beer goggles are not the same thing.
It doesn’t even really look like Madden is enjoying it. If he does get the nod, I hope he can act well enough to make it look like it’s not the first time he’s ever had alcohol.
I hope it’s Aaron Taylor-Johnson. He’s a much better and more interesting actor. But maybe too young?
I know it’s no 0ne’s business, but I feel like Richard Madden’s homosexuality is going to become a “thing” if he becomes Bond, and that whole discourse is just going to be annoying. He’s very secretive about it and I think it would be a bummer to see him get attacked by all these toxic masculinity assholes.
Nah. Daniel Craig was blond and can’t drive manual and goes out in public holding the child he produced through heterosexual means with a woman, so he’s basically gay. It’ll be fine.
A blond Bond is probably more scandalous, indeed.
A blond Bond shell?
What the…..??? Lol
I’m pretty sure their comment is referencing the tabloids from when Craig was first announced as Bond.
We need a slur for those degenerate scum who can’t drive manual.
Source: The squirrel that lives in your skull
Source? Look at the reactions when there was talk of casting a black actor for Bond. Idiots in the internet will flip if Bond isn’t a straight white male.
Unless his mouth has been on your dick, you don’t know his sexuality
He’s been in a relationship with Froy Gutierrez for years, but you’re right, he may not adhere to that label.But you think the toxic assholes on the internet are going to care what he labels himself? He obviously values his privacy, but being cast as Bond is going to cast a huge spotlight on his personal life. I’m not looking forward to the “discourse”.
The fuck is a Froy?
Well, it’s not quite a Frenchman, and it’s not quite a goy, but man… *chuckles* So to answer your question: I don’t know.
Why would gay dude have to play gay character? Let him play hetero Bond, and none the wiser.
He wouldn’t have to play Bond as gay, but, and maybe the internet has just trained me to be cynical, I feel like a large vocal part of the internet will still freak out about a non-hetero man playing Bond. It will get treated as some big scandal. Hopefully I’m wrong, but my faith in humanity is pretty low right now.
I had no idea Madden was even rumored (not confirmed, from what I can tell) to be gay until you mentioned it, so maybe don’t keep bringing it up if you value his privacy?
I’d heard about it, I think, but mostly because of his role in Rocketman, which I dismissed as being basically reactionary nonsense (The same rumors follow Taron Egerton as well). It honestly seems like a pretty poor choice of roles if he’s trying to keep it secret, though. He’s stated that he wants to keep his private life private, so it’s probably not that he’s hiding it, just that he doesn’t want the celebrity part that comes with being an actor.
Yeah I wasn’t saying no one had heard of it, just that it’s not hugely common knowledge, and to someone who claims to care about his privacy, just consider not going around saying “HE’S GAY HE’S GAY” even though he’s never even said he’s gay and in a context in which it’s not even relevant to what’s being talked about. Especially if he actually wants the role of James Bond, maybe don’t go around telling the internet (and any producers who might be reading) why he’s not a good fit for the role due to his possible gayness (obviously I don’t feel like we need another white Bond, but I don’t want a white Bond disqualified due to his rumored sexuality).As for a poor choice of roles. I haven’t seen Rocketman and have no idea what his role was but assuming it was a gay role, straight actors play gay roles all the time, so I don’t see how playing a gay person automatically has to mean you’re gay.
They don’t really hide it. They live together, vacation together, are photographed together. He just doesn’t publicly talk about it.
Right, he doesn’t talk about it (whatever it is) because he values his privacy. If you value his privacy, do you have to talk about it? Let the dude be.
Wait, Richard Madden is gay? Huh. I had no idea. So I guess the Matt Bomer’s competition for “most handsome gay man in Hollywood” just heated up.
I have three “Not gay, but I would…” situations.
1) Daniel Day-Lewis in Last of the Mohicans
2) Brad Pitt in Troy
3) Matt Bomer’s general existence.
I would rather see Stanley Tucci as Bond.
Honestly, is there anything appealing about this character other than the fact that millions have already heard of him? He’s good looking, sophisticated, resourceful, a bit tortured, a general badass, but so is every other action hero. What sets Bond apart is his connection to Britain’s past global hegemony, which I think most could do without at this point. Hire some better writers (the last Bond was painfully dull), up the advertising $ and let’s retire this has-been.
I’m genuinely hoping that’s what this turns out to be for.
Bjork for Bond! Make it so!
“Do you really expect me to campaign for the role?”“No, Mr Madden, I expect you to audition!”
“They never auditioned the other guy.”
I prefer to think of it as announcing Stanley Tucci is going to be the next James Bond.
I can’t believe someone managed to churn out an entire article on this.
“The far more likely explanation is that they’re playing everybody so that people like us”And here you are
but what could that possibly mean?
It means “Go shave. You look like you’re trying out for Nixon.”
“The far more likely explanation is that they’re playing everybody so that people like us and people like Deadline will write stories”You know you could have chosen to not…