The Transformers movies have made enough money to buy actual, living Transformers that could be used to destroy humanity, and yet nobody on the planet will actually admit to enjoying them. Statistically, like, 90% of you have to be lying, so it’s about time that we all stop pretending how cool and smart we are and just admit that the Transformers movies—especially the first three, but especially the Mark Wahlberg one—are the best movies that we’ve ever seen. Plus, if we all just decide to start loving them, it’s going to make the rest of our lives a lot easier when Paramount starts dumping out a million sequels and spinoffs.
Thankfully, Paramount is taking steps to make sure those sequels and spinoffs seem a little more appetizing to the discriminating movie goer. According to Deadline, the studio has just finished putting together a “writer’s room” of ace sci-fi writers who will do everything they can to make future Transformers movies at least as good as the earlier Transformers movies. In order of how impressed you should be, the team consists of Ready Player One and X-Men: The Last Stand writer Zak Penn, Amazing Spider-Man 2‘s Jeff Pinkner, Iron Man writers Art Marcum and Matt Holloway, and Walking Dead creator Robert Kirkman. Yes, the same Robert Kirkman who wrote the extremely successful comic book that inspired an extremely successful TV show (and an upcoming spinoff!) and who almost certainly should have better things to do than write Transformers movies.
So, will these guys actually be able to make the Transformers movies good? That was a trick question. The Transformers movies have always been—and will always be—good. Just keep repeating that to yourself until you believe it, and then you’ll be a lot happier.