That mystery reunion Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul have been teasing for weeks is actually just some artisanal booze
Aux Features TV
Over the last few weeks, Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul have been teasing a mysterious project that reunites the Breaking Bad co-stars. Given what we know, it was reasonable to assume that this project—which the duo teased in a series of social media posts and photos—would be none other than the forthcoming Breaking Bad movie. Directed by series creator Vince Gilligan, that movie is said to center on Paul’s Jesse Pinkman, and may or may not (but probably totally does) co-star Cranston in some capacity. Today, Cranston and Paul delivered on the promise of their new collaboration by unveiling what is easily the most unholy of sick burns—the kind of thing that YouTube reaction videos were made for:
Surprise, it’s an artisanal Mezcal. See, it’s funny because you thought you were getting a trailer for that Breaking Bad movie, which is totally reasonable since it shot last year and is presumably finished already. But instead you get what is probably an overpriced “artisanal” booze product, the love child of these two buds, or “Dos Hombres,” if you will. Psych! Those two guys done gone and fooled ya real good. Breaking Bad? More like breaking your dignity, dummies. You know, artisanal Mezcal is great for sterilizing mega-sick-burns.
34 Comments
Everyone wants that George Clooney money. Metallica even came out with their own whiskey, Blackened.
Everybody does Whiskey. I choose to follow a true original.
In your grocer’s Tofurky section.
This is probably my favorite celebrity endorsed product.
Pickle juice tastes like garbage.
Well, it’s actual pickle juice, so duh.
Presumably so does Jason Witten.
Much like Larry himself, that just looks like a bunch of loose meat floating around in a bag of mystery liquid.
Blackened: The Whiskey That Kills Your Friend, Makes Your Band Suck And Finally Gets Your Whiny Ass Into Therapy
Ironically, Sammy Hagar was probably the original celebrity owning & making a fortune from a liquor brand with Cabo Wabo Tequila. He started it in the mid-90’s and sold it for something like $100 million.
I can’t help but feel they’re messing with us. What if there’s a chance this product ties in with the upcoming movie?They obviously know the teaser posts would’ve enraged fans otherwise, correct?
They seem like such good pals I can’t even get mad at them. This would be like if Skwisgar and Toki founded their own absinthe factory.
“I can’t even get mad at them.”Read that stupid ad copy that Cranston supposedly wrote and you’ll get there.
Being expected to believe those two searched high and low through rural Mexico for the past three years for the perfect mezcal is frankly insulting. Two white guys showing up to discover (like it’s a mezcal spring) and buy out traditional culture then repackage it to make money off other white people sounds believable though.
Nah I’ll be too busy getting drunk off their overpriced liquor. JK,if I had any animosity towards Cranston it would be for that lazy/awful superbowl commercial he did a few years ago. Now that is a stupid ad.
Yeah, I love these guys, but fuck this.
What a couple of artisans for teasing us so.
“Los Pollos Hermanos” was right there, man.
I’m not buying booze made from chemically disincorporated corpses, Mr. White.
“it was reasonable to assume that this project…would be none other than the forthcoming Breaking Bad movie.”
WALTER WHITE IS DEAD. IT WAS NOT REASONABLE TO THINK THIS WAS THE MOVIE.
This seems like an odd Malcolm in the Middle spin-off, but I’ll go with it.
Is there any chance this is an elaborate ARG?
The fact that the mezcal isn’t blue is a crime, however ironic that is in the context of the show 🍬
BUY OUR BOOZE BITCHFUCK YEAH LIVER FAILUREI hate drinking.
Alcohol altogether is pretty lame, but as a drug, yeah, I’d rather just shoot heroin then.
Yeah! Marketing, bitch!
You’d be foolish to expect a trailer for the Breaking Bad movie.
But where are the talking donkeys?
Edit, gif failure to gif. Curious balloon with eyes gifDeflating balloon gifOh well. I was intrigued at first by their pairing, but it just turned out to be another celeb booze launch. Sounds like an easy, minimal effort way to earn a few bucks, so good for them, I ‘spose.
I don’t find many things offensive, but promoting the deadliest drug on this planet as “artisanal” comes really fucking close.
It’s not even blue….
mezcal is the best booze.that is all.
And then it turns out to be a respectable mezcal.