With the release of the new, Michael Bay-produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles came the debut of “,” a song by Wiz Khalifa, Juicy J, and Ty Dolla $ign that fulfills the Ninja Turtles franchise requisite of a rap song about being a Ninja Turtle. But with its generic lyrics about fighting battles and how “we all want our cut like Shredder,” the song’s function as a true Ninja Turtles narrative pales in comparison even to Vanilla Ice’s “”—which, really, is mostly about the Turtles’ dance skills. And it certainly doesn’t hold a candle to Partners In Kryme’s “Turtle Power.” The lyrics of “Turtle Power” are so thorough in their recounting of the 1990 film’s plotline—from the Turtles’ origins through their first meeting with April O’Neil through the abduction of Splinter that leads to the climactic confrontation—you don’t even need to see Ninja Turtles, possibly in any iteration. [SO]
