The earliest nerd loves are often the deepest; maybe that’s the reason I feel confident I could handle the solemn duties of Wikipedia keeper for Douglas Adams’ Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy series, which I fell in love with at the tender, impressionable age of 13. You want obscure trivia from the original radio series? I got you set, courtesy of Napster-ing every (then-extant) episode of the show back in 1998. An outline of which plotlines Adams cribbed from his other job at Doctor Who? Got you covered, friend. A brief lexicon of fake words the books injected into nerd culture? I assure you, reader: I’m your hoopiest of froods. More important, though, is what will not be making the cut on my version of the page: Any references to Eoin Colfer’s god-awful, blasphemous attempt to extend the series with a sixth book in 2009. You might call my hatred-fueled idea to 1984 away a book I don’t like as geeky intellectual supremacy taken to its most dictatorial excesses, to which my only response is: Welcome to Wikipedia, motherfuckers. That’s how we do. [William Hughes]
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feces
No fucking way, feces are way too complex to be handled by one individual. Poop requires a triumvirate at least.That’s a string of words I never thought I’d be saying… again.
*a trectumvirate.
I normally hate emojis but this definitely deserves some applause 👏👏👏
A general list of Futile Eradication Efforts Towards Incessant Possibly Omnicient Female Chin Hairs…for a friend.
I often times update Doctor Who wikis.
My condolences
Hi, William!
I could keep Power Rangers (and many of its subpages) on lock. Well okay, up to a point. After season 9 my knowledge gets a little shaky (Time Force) and after 13 (SPD) I had fully embraced sleeping until noon rather than watching Saturday morning cartoons. But hey man, I’m practically an encyclopedia about those first 9!
Uh… Uh… *Types random string of letters into Wikipedia* I could keep track of the… “March 1898 Japanese general election.” Well, I’m boned.
I still fix little things on WP once in a while, but I’ll never again try to keep a specific page up the way I think it should be. That way lies madness.I got a glimpse of that madness from both sides when I happened upon the page about an artist I slightly knew. I found a couple of out-of-date things, and also some pretty large sections of totally unsourced and non-neutral material that was just basically rambling about how cool he was… so I started making some edits, trying to keep in mind that I should be as neutral as possible and not throw in stuff that I just happened to know. Almost immediately I started getting a bunch of super-pissy messages from the person who had (as I realized when I checked the history) been responsible for nearly everything on the page before. How dare I imply that those sections weren’t sourced or neutral; I’m going to tell the arbitrators what you’re doing and you’ll get in trouble; etc. (I learned only later that this person was infamous for endlessly harassing other editors and twisting WP guidelines into weird pseudo-legal arguments—eventually got banned, and then re-banned several times for sock-puppetry). At some point I mentioned that not only was one of the “facts” unsourced, so it shouldn’t be in there even if it happened to be true, but I had (equally unsourced) personal knowledge that it was incorrect because I had met the artist in question. That triggered an even bigger rant: “Oh, so you admit you have a conflict of interest! I’ll get you in even bigger trouble now!”Anyway, at some point I ended up emailing the artist: “Hey, how’s it going, by the way did you know you have a Wikipedia page? And there’s this incredibly argumentative fan who’s determined to control it?” He took a look at some of the messages and immediately wrote back: “Uh… that’s my [immediate family member]. They’re nuts. You should probably just walk away. Sorry.”I did walk away, but first I wrote back to the creep just to say that “conflict of interest” was a phrase you should think twice about bringing up in this context if you know what I mean. Never heard another word.
Oh, I have a few I could manage well. Bob’s Burgers, Marvel comics, literary theory, critical theory, bad Michel Foucault impersonators…
I’d love to oversee the Bob’s Burgers article, maybe update the sections on guest voices, Burgers of the Day, exterminator and new store gags…
I bet I could manage the one dedicated to me banging your mom.
Bang!
One per list?
That is Jules Gill, one of the wild ones of whatculture.com. On their YouTube channel, if Jules does it (with a few, rare exceptions) he makes a Your Mom reference. Thought that was where we were going.
Apparently not.
Nah, I’m just old as fuck. Like your mom.
And there’s your One Per List.
Boy Meets World. When ABC Family aired five episodes per morning form 2011 to about 2015/16 I watched pretty much every episode when I was home working (which was pretty much every day.) I watched Eric’s slow descent into idiocy. I watched one opening title sequence be worst than the last. And teared up every time Mr. Feeney closes out the series.I know every episode and still run through it all on Hulu about twice a year while working. It’s perfect background entertainment.
Who updates the Wikipedia list of shitty internet articles?
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_United_States_Christmas_television_episodesI’ve found a half dozen that aren’t on it and I view it hundreds of times a year anyways… I probably just should.
JFK. By which I mean the Oliver Stone movie. I would say the JFK assassination itself, but I would just not do it. Not because I don’t think I am informed on the subject, but I simply would not want the headache that would come from it. So I would stick to a page about Oliver Stone’s movie on the subject.
I can and do mod the Guided By Voices page. It’s not easy, as you could imagine. I even know the guys personally which makes it even more difficult.
Springsteen or the Beatles.
Mission HillThe one season wonder from Simpsons vets Bill Oakley and Josh Weinstein aired on the WB and was pretty much dead on arrival. Yet I was there from the first episode and loved it deeply, and was vindicated when it started airing on [adult swim] and finally found an audience. Before I ever came to the AV Club, I was a regular on the [adult swim] message boards, spreading the Mission Hill gospel among other things. I maintained regular episode discussion threads whenever it was airing, and my signature space was stuffed with links to a Mission Hill soundtrack list, a partial animatic with voice over for an incomplete episode, and other stuff. I still remember a lot of info from creator interviews and the DVD commentaries, I could 100% handle that page. Also, I am still super-bummed that I never maintained a VHS tape or two with all the episodes. The DVD set removed all the licensed music and it bothers the hell out of me. Sometimes it was just setting the mood perfectly (Looper’s “Burning Flies” plays as we see Andy walk through the neighborhood for the first time), sometimes it was an actual joke that is now lost (REM’s “Everybody Hurts” playing in the Real World episode after the Puck-a-like gets hit by a car). I have some of the original versions on tape, but they are mixed in with a bunch of other [as] shows.
That DVD set could’ve been a lot better. Like you said, the licensed music is all gone, and there are a few episodes where the audio-mixing is just downright awful. It’d be nice if Shout! Factory or some other company put out a definitive DVD set with all the licensed music intact and what remains of the unfinished episodes.
Man, a lovingly assembled Shout! release would be fantastic. I just don’t think there is the audience for it, or at least not enough of one to justify the time and money to wrangle that licensed music. But I would buy the hell out of it! I was honestly surprised we even got the DVD set to begin with. Even among cult comedy and animation circles like the AV Club its still pretty under the radar, although occasionally I will see a “Kafka-esque” or “No Meat Touching Please!” reference here and it warms my heart.
the episodes are on youtube but i don’t know if they’re from the dvd set or not
Last time I saw a channel streaming them on youtube I stopped to check and they were playing the DVD versions, I’ll have to do some more digging and see if someone uploaded the originals also.
Thanks for reminding me of that show. I used to watch it on Adult Swim back when I watched Adult Swim almost every night in college. Totally forgot it existed.
@Randall ColburnIf you haven’t watched the web series “Zack Morris is Trash” you need to get on it.
I hate to be pedantic, wait, no I don’t….Nobody ‘maintains’ wikipedia pages. Many different editors have pages on their watchlists. There isn’t a boss of any page or anything. It just doesn’t work like that.Anyone can edit any page (with a few exceptions).
Wikipedia should be destroyed, which is not a Wikipedia page, but something that should 100% happen immediately
Really scraping the bottom of the barrel here, eh?
Anything related to the Pokemon games. I was thinking of joining the wiki, Bulbapedia, to contribute to lesser known aspects, like listing the trainers found in Emerald’s Battle Tents. (I didn’t say they were particularly useful aspects.)
I think I could handle the page for IO9. How hard would it be to maintain the phrase “Complete and utter crap”?
Guam. I don’t actually know much about Guam, but I’m sure the Guamish are a very nice people and I’d be happy to maintain their Wikipedia page for them.
I could do misanthropy and cynicism.
I’m as much of an Adams stan as anyone, but I really didn’t mind Eoin Colfer’s HHGTTG entry. In many ways it was preferable to the dour Mostly Harmless.
Sasha Grey