In news that could very possibly link Willie Nelson to weed in the public consciousness, The Daily Beast reports that the beloved country singer and sentient pot cloud is preparing to launch his own brand of marijuana—available wherever fine marijuana is sold, without the hassle of the law or going to Trent’s house. Willie’s Reserve could be available to buy as early as next year, joining Bob Marley Naturals and Snoop Dogg’s Master Kush in the growing line of official, celebrity-endorsed pot strains from the most obvious of celebrity potheads. And like celebrity beer and wine before it, it represents a burgeoning new realm of ways for stars to make money from you getting fucked up.
In addition to releasing the signature Willie’s Reserve strain, presumably cultivated from clippings of Willie himself, the plan involves establishing storefronts that will sell it, alongside strains from other growers who meet the standards that Nelson has devised through decades of intense study. “Let’s just call it the anti-Walmart model,” Nelson’s publicist Michael Bowman says, referring to the company’s commitment to focusing on small, environmentally conscious growers, as well as the fact that going to Walmart is a huge buzzkill.
Instead, Bowman compares Willie’s Reserve to Whole Foods, where “Whole Foods has their 365 brand, or you can buy Stony Brook, or you can buy Horizon.” And like Whole Foods, you’ll probably also be able to buy some expensive, crappy hemp clothing. But most importantly, you’ll be able to buy your weed from Willie Nelson, which is a dream that every pot smoker has had at one time or another, along with the one about work somehow being canceled tomorrow. Maybe there will be a fire or something, I don’t know.
That is, unless you don’t live in a state where marijuana has already been legalized for commercial distribution, and therefore won’t be among the few places where Willie’s Reserve can safely open without reprisal. If that’s the case, you’ll still have to make small talk with Trent for now.