You, too, can live like a star with Grimes' spaghetti, hotdog, and toast-centric meal plan

Aux Features Music
You, too, can live like a star with Grimes' spaghetti, hotdog, and toast-centric meal plan
Screenshot: Harper’s Bazaar

To become a successful artist, it’s important to adhere to a strict regimen that hones the body and mind to their utmost. In the case of Grimes, who recently released the excellent album, Miss Anthropocene, we’ve already been familiarized with her (totally serious) description of a training routine that consists of deprivation tank isolation, sword-fighting and screaming sessions, and the use of an experimental, blue light-removing eye surgery.

Now, filling in the blank spots left behind by this partial vision of her lifestyle secrets, Grimes has returned to detail the food any aspiring musician needs to be eating to achieve her level of success.

In the latest entry to Harper’s Bazaar’s Food Diaries video series, Grimes discusses dietary staples like her version of “butter toast,” which involves “melting a stick of butter on a plate” and then soaking toast in it and applying a bit of jam. Though pregnancy has required her to change her habits, Grimes says she doesn’t like anything but “carbs and fat,” describing broccoli as “vile” and saying she “[hates] fruit.” Following this, she explains past meal plans, like being “vegan” during the Art Angels tour and “only eating spaghetti” for a year or two until her “hair stopped growing” and a doctor told her she was malnourished.

Elsewhere in the video, she explains how to make “Sludge,” which is a dish that consists of couscous, vegan mayonnaise, sriracha, celery, tomatoes, and steamed spinach mixed together into an edible glop, and extols the virtues of hotdogs. “I love hotdogs because they don’t kill cows for hotdogs,” she explains. “You can eat hotdogs without guilt if you need meat, but you still have vegan tendencies or you want to try to avoid creating demand for stuff because it’s just all the waste—all the extra product.”

So there you have it. If you’re a struggling musician, tirelessly working to perfect your craft, but still looking for that secret edge that’s led others to mainstream success, just follow Grimes’ path to stardom by living a lifestyle filled with butter-marinated toast, bowls of Sludge, and plenty of hotdogs.

[via Stereogum]

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40 Comments

  • igotsuped-av says:

    You’re telling me I can eat Grimes’ special dietetic lunch?

  • SarDeliac-av says:

    Has she ever been tested to see if she has brain damage? It seems like maybe someone should have that checked.

    • anotherburnersorry-av says:

      I would not be surprised to hear that Elon Musk talked her into getting some kind of cyborg chip implant that ended up failing and killing half her brain tissue

    • lordtouchcloth-av says:

      I have no idea why the hell she’s so popular. Because she funnel’s the internet’s favourite Yarpie blowhard’s hog?

  • lordpooppants3-av says:

    “I love hotdogs because they don’t kill cows for hotdogs,”Ummmm, where to begin with this…

  • modusoperandi0-av says:

    “I love hotdogs because they don’t kill cows for hotdogs…”

    /a series of sad pigs stare at camera while Sarah Mclachlan’s ‘In the Arms of an Angel’ plays in background

  • elvis316-av says:

    Oh, Grimey. 

  • squirtloaf-av says:

    She has perfected the look of a mister potato head someone has put random parts on.

  • jizbam-av says:

    A single plum, floating in perfume, served in a man’s hat.

  • hawkboy2018-av says:

    With her having a kid on the way, should we just place a call to Child Protective Services to give them a heads-up ahead of time? 

  • zerocool69-av says:

    I miss not knowing things about people whose art I like.

  • praxinoscope-av says:

    Clearly the maxim, “Garbage in, garbage out” is especially true of garbage people.

  • martyfunkhouser1-av says:

    Her baby will be a boy named Gerald.

  • newhack1-av says:

    ummm no, this woman does not eat any of this. She’s anorexic.

  • igotlickfootagain-av says:

    Celebrities, they’re just like us: trash-eating morons.

  • droopdrawersabbey-av says:

    A roll of nickles. Continues to be all I can think about whenever faced with anything Grimes related.

  • fiestaforeva2-av says:

    I’m pregnant myself and the food described in this article made me gag multiple times.

  • luasdublin-av says:

    The one thing I like about being a non American in my 40s , is that other than the occasional article here , I have zero interaction with people like this ( never heard any of her music , never seen her on a video, and if it turns out she was just made up for articles like this I wouldn’t totally be surprised)

    • gussiefinknottle1934-av says:

      Talking with these sort of people are definitely better avoided.However being ignorant to someone like Grimes as a musician is not a virtue. Obviously music is completely subjective but she’s made plenty music that is kinda awesome, in mine and many other nerdy music types’ opinion. It’s best to avoid interviews with her but it turns out annoying weirdos often make pretty good art. It’s only in this social media era where we somehow require people to not be dicknozzles. Mozart would’ve been fucked(and I’m not comparing her music to Mozarts obviously)(Also I guess Mozart not being well liked in his time didn’t exactly work out well for him)

      • burnerburnzg-av says:

        Grimes is ripping off another artist, many others have said it too. The things you admire her for isn’t hers. Check the tag Boycott grimes on twitter. Elon musk conspiracy but also about those she’s coerced, and those she’s harrasing to take their art.

        • gussiefinknottle1934-av says:

          I did have a poke around on that hashtag and it mostly seems to be attacking who she is, particularly suggesting she faked a pregnancy. I was merely suggesting her music is pretty good – sure it takes in a lot of other styles, she’s certain not innovating anything. However there’s plenty music that takes bobs and bits of other stuff, it’s kinda part and parcel of a lot of music – particularly electronic which tends to revel it how it grabs bits of other genre.Perhaps there’s evidence her music is straight up ripping other people off? Would happily reconsider my opinion if that’s the case. However an artist taking bits of more “heady” music and popifying it? That’s just part of music and sometimes (in the case of Grimes) it works pretty well becoming it’s own thing rather than a lesser version of something else. Doesn’t mean it’s my favourite (don’t get me wrong, I’m a big nerd for electronic stuff, there’s a tonne of artists I’d rather listen to than Grimes) but doesn’t mean it’s without value…

    • hedgewise-av says:

      Her music’s pretty decent but the woman is batshit nuts. She got knocked up by Elon Musk and had the lapse in judgement to once be friends with Azealia Banks. And maybe she thinks hot dogs are vegan? I think the reason she’s insane and a pretty good musician is acid.

  • EbolaO-av says:

    Her GD lisp is killing me. I’ve never heard her talk prior to this after listening to her music for years. LOL! She just seems like any fucking weirdo vegan. Who can’t shut up about being Vegan.

  • basilmetabolism-av says:

    Crazy, idiot, both?

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