Kal Penn tells Jimmy Kimmel how he manifested Cardi B officiating his wedding in a dream
To be fair, the actor, author, and former Obama staffer says that Twitter helped a little bit
TV News Kal
Everybody who decides to get married has their own idea of what constitutes a dream wedding. For Kal Penn, who recently confirmed his engagement to longtime boyfriend Josh, however, it took an actual dream for his subconscious to reveal just which celebrity officiant would make the couple’s big day truly memorable. Appearing on Monday’s Jimmy Kimmel Live to promote his memoir, You Can’t Be Serious, the erstwhile Kumar and Obama administration official admitted that what first was merely the stuff of literal dreams became potential reality when his post-slumber Twitter goof wound up all but securing Cardi B as his and Josh’s wedding emcee.
Noting that his initial impulse to say hello to the singer when he realized they were on the same cross-county flight was thwarted when he immediately fell asleep, Penn told Kimmel that even a near-miss with Cardi B can get into your head. Telling Kimmel that the resulting dream saw Cardi presiding over a mid-air wedding ceremony for him and Josh (and then walking arm in arm out of LAX), Penn explained how he tweeted about the situation upon waking. Cue Cardi’s answering Twitter response that she is very down to make the couple’s 11-year relationship official, which apparently blew Penn’s mind, since he hadn’t even tagged Cardi, thinking that his dreamtime fantasies weren’t worthy of disturbing a Grammy winner.
Silly Kal, as now he’s on track to having Cardi B officiate what Penn surmises will be a traditional, ten-day Indian wedding ceremony, date to be determined. For Penn, such an indirect and unlikely way of getting what his heart desires from an acclaimed Grammy winner isn’t new, apparently, as the Clarice actor told Kimmel that it took a chance meeting (and a pushy manager) to get his dream job in the Obama administration’s Public Engagement Office. Penn had been with the future President’s campaign since Obama was just Senator Barack Obama (D-IL), and 30 points down in the polls, but his quest to turn volunteerism into a paying gig saw him merely filling out an online application, and then waiting for a call that never came.
Luckily (or perhaps due to the universe apparently looking out for Kal Penn), the actor was asked to speak at now President Obama’s inaugural concert, where, in the greeting line to shake hands with the new First Family, his manager butted in to complain that his client had never even gotten a response to his note-in-a-bottle application. Penn, recalling how his initial reaction was a horrified, “Yo, this is not the time,” yet found himself greeted by the raised eyebrows of Michelle Obama, who called her husband over to join in the amusement at Penn’s obvious discomfort.
After ascertaining that their famous volunteer was, indeed, serious, Penn, noting Mrs. Obama’s famously “low threshold for BS,” found himself duly evaluated, and ultimately hired, to run point on the incoming administration’s outreach to Asian-Americans and Pacific Islanders, and to the young people. Speaking of the role most of those young people associate with the actor (who worked, under his birth name Kalpen Modi for nearly the entirety of Obama’s two terms), Penn did admit to some trepidation about answering the “have you ever smoked marijuana” question on his FBI background check. After all, the actor did take a leave of absence to film his contractually obligated A Very Harold And Kumar 3D Christmas, after all, ultimately returning to his government job once the smoke had cleared.
9 Comments
Seems like a good guy…but he doesn’t always pick his projects that well…he seems to go for the thing on the biggest network over the best part. I’m still a little miffed about what they did to him on “24″, that show was nazi propaganda.
Big fan Kal, but why……. WHY CARDI B?!?!?!
His doctor told him he needs more cardio, but he’s starting small.
Must be great being famous, you just put your fantasy wedding officiator out into the ether and the world makes it a reality. It’s worked for Kal Pen and I assume it’ll work for Kristen Stewart, too.
Genuinely vexed by the desire to have a stranger officiate a wedding. I suppose if it has to be a stranger, then Cardi B or Guy Fieri or whatever are more than suitable choices. For me it was important that the officiant be someone my wife and I knew, trusted, etc. As it happens one of my best friends was already ordained, but I already had him tapped as a groomsman. Fortunately my wife has an “uncle” (lifelong time family friend) who was also ordained and more than happy to serve. If I was religious I suppose whomever my childhood or regular priest/pastor/rabbi/imam/etc would hopefully have some idea who I was and could play the role. But I’m very much not. And I just couldn’t fathom having a rando playing such a central role in one of the most important days in my life.
We didn’t know our officiant, never saw her once the ceremony was over, and can’t recall her name now. For me, she was perfect: she did the job, and then got out of the way. My Dad didn’t even LIKE the priest that married him and my Mom, and I’m fairly certain that decades later he still resents that that guy’s signature is on the certificate. The officiant should be the least memorable part of the day if they’re doing their job right: I’m not sure why anyone would want to stunt-cast it.
Honestly I don’t think there should be an officiant at all. It’s a sacred union between two people and, if you’re a believer, the Boss upstairs. I looked briefly into states that allowed that sort of thing and I think there might be some states that allow it but not many and not where we were living at the time. So if there had to be one, I wanted it to be someone who genuinely knew an loved us. Worst officiant I ever saw was a dual ceremony that included a minister (can’t remember, maybe Presbyterian?) and an Imam. Presbyterian guy was fine. But the Imam showed up crazy late, was kind of a dick, and seemed to kind of keep the Muslim portion of the ceremony shrouded in mystery with the groom and his immediate male family members sitting in a circle I think having a conversation no one else could hear and then signing a contract. The wedding was in Pennsyltucky and the bride’s father had already said some garbage racist stuff leading up to the wedding so I was really hoping the Imam would show up and blow everyone’s doors off by being awesome but instead he sucked.
I hate to do this, because I never believe internet commenters that “just happen” to have expertise in the subject under discussion, so I will ask for your patience here, but my spouse is Muslim. Our officiant was secular, but I’ve been to a bunch of Muslim weddings, and what you described is literally what they are – a conversation amongst the principals, and a contract. They’re often over in 15 minutes or so, and it’s not uncommon for most of the wedding invitees to skip that part of the festivities entirely. It would have been inauthentic if the Imam had done a song-and-dance routine to please the expectations of the non-Muslims.
I appreciate the context, thanks for explaining. Even so though, from the audience it looked like this [and remember, I’m rooting for this guy]:Imam shows shows up easily 45 minutes late to the ceremony while everyone has been waiting. Blows in, no apology or explanation. Either the groom or one of his family members, can’t remember who, but definitely not the Imam, gives a very brief and unclear explanation of the Muslim part of the ceremony that’s about to take place.Groom and three or four of his family members sit in a circle under a tent and talk about… something, totally unclear what, no one can hear anything or knows what’s going on, frankly just feels like more waiting. Bride is sitting off to the side not participating at all. This goes on at least 15 minutes. Ceremony ends. Imam leaves and does not stick around for the reception because alcohol is going to be served. The whole thing was taxing even for someone who tries their best to be open minded and was genuinely curious about what a Muslim ceremony would be like and how it would work. And this is probably the first, and probably only, exposure a lot of the attendees will ever have to a Muslim ceremony, or Muslim anything of any sort. It just wasn’t a great impression. If he doesn’t give a shit about nonbelievers that’s fine and I can understand that perspective, but I guess I’d be shocked if there weren’t at least some Imams out there somewhere trying to be at least a little inclusive/welcoming and would have handled the whole thing differently.