Put that coffee down and watch Kathryn Hahn's kids recreate Glengarry Glen Ross with dolls
Aux Features Film
David Mamet’s Glengarry Glen Ross is one of the best plays of the ‘80s, one of the best movies of the ‘90s, and one of the most toilet-mouthed pieces of art of all time. Sure, its soul-crushing depiction of Chicago real estate hustlers and the weight of the grind is plenty absorbing, but the real joy comes from watching actors wrap their mouths around Mamet’s rat-a-tat language and gobsmacking obscenities. There’s a reason Alec Baldwin’s iconic, brow-beating monologue has become as quoted as a golden-era Simpsons episode.
But, because Baldwin’s monologue exists only in the film, not the play, it isn’t included in this excellent clip of Kathryn Hahn and her kids performing scenes from it, which was posted as part of the Geffen Playhouse’s “Geffen Stayhouse” quarantine series. Instead, Hahn, her husband Ethan Sandler, and their children recruit a few American Girl dolls to knock out some less vulgar scenes featuring characters played onscreen by Al Pacino, Alan Arkin, and Kevin Spacey. That said, there’s no avoiding the text’s myriad of “fucks,” so you’ll still get to hear a pre-teen say “don’t fuck with me, fella” to her dad.
Hahn, who recently stunned as Mrs. Fletcher’s titular protagonist, also appears as Arkin’s Aaronow, which allows her to declare she’s “through with this fucking meshugaas” through her American Girl counterpart. In the end, all the dolls get a bow, including Brownie, a stuffed dog that marks the family’s only addition to the original material.
If you’re entertained, perhaps you’ll consider donating to the Geffen, which, like every other theater in America, is figuring out what to do when you can’t have a live audience.
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60 Comments
It is bleeped. But still amazing.
Yeah, I’d bet money her script said “freak” or similar.
That’s what I was thinking. They probably had the kids say another word, and then applied the Jimmy Kimmel unnecessary censorship effect.
That doesn’t seem like Kathryn Hahn’s MO.
Does bleeping them seem like it is?
No. That’s what I said.
You are half correct.
Is the full correct answer that the kids can emit a sustained frequency that others perceive as the censor beep?
I’m always half correct.
Except when I’m Completely correct.
…checks out.
Christ, that was bad. Maybe it was that the volume came blasting thru my headphones and about blew out my ear drums, but that was painful. Here’s a lizard I found to make up for it:
Yeah that was very contrived and stupid
We’ll get a Newswire tomorrow saying “Lizard offered 10 episode series on Quibi”.
Fuckin Quibi. Ya know they made it impossible to ‘mirror screen’ their programs onto a tv from an apple ios? It’s like their goal was to fail.
JJ Abrams set to executive produce
You’re such a hero, you’re so rich, how come you’re coming down here wasting your time with a bunch of bums?
Cause I’m a bum? Not sure what you’re getting at. I enjoy the av clubs‘ coverage of various programs that I may or may not watch. My opinions are just those of a peon such as myself.
I’m just watching everything sail over your head.
Feel better thinking you’re oh so very smart? Here’s the cat to calm you down:
You wanna learn the first rule? You’d know if you’d ever spent a day in your life. You never open your mouth until you know what the shot is.
Calm down there, buddy. No one is challenging your manhood. Me making an ass out of myself is par for the course.
You ever take a dump made you feel like you’d just slept for twelve hours?
I’ve had diarrhea that the first 7-10 seconds of it made me feel like my bowels had completely cleansed themselves. It’s a glorious experience.
Mamet definitely should have included this interjection, then in the movie, Pacino can just look at Jonathan Pryce for ten second…then continue
He’s quoting a line from the movie (possibly also the play?) at you.
Well, if he did, then he outsmarted me. Being a jackass is the norm for me, so have at it.
You gonna be ok, dip shit? You seem upset. Maybe go fuck yourself until you feel better.
kill yourself
IDK, perhaps David Geffen could consider donating to the Geffen Playhouse or have they lost the # to his yacht? I know my covid check should last me 1o weeks, (would Mnuchin lie?) but I’m kinda strapped right now.
Whoever told these kids they could work with men??
What is this, your farewell speech? Your farewell to the troops?
Will you get out of here. Will you get out of here. Will you
Get a fucking life.
kill yourself
These kids need to learnin’ their a b c’s!
Buncha fuckin’ nonsense!
I love me some Kathryn Hahn, but celebrities really need to stay the fuck off camera until this blows over.
You don’t like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the materials you’ve got and make myself $15,000. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise.
Technically, she did.
They’re also specifically raising money for a theater she’s associated with, not singing Imagine for random reasons. I think you can give her a pass.
Eh, this seems harmless enough to me.
lol you are never not miserable
A AlwaysB BeC Carping
Coffee is for complainers!
Why? She wasn’t lecturing people to stay at home from a mega mansion, this was a fun thing she did with her family to support a theater. What’s the problem?
Well if I can’t watch celebrity videos, what can I watch? I’ve watched too much porn! I CAN’T KEEP MASTURBATING!!!!
Sadly, this is the closest we’ll ever come to a Mamet play with all female characters.
It’s so adorable when attention starved celebrities use their kids to get views.
this is literally a genre of video intended for 8 year olds. within one month avclub will be posting reviews of pacifiers
kill yourself
I love regional theater. Get in there with some Reservoir Dogs gang! Or … sticking to the stage. Hmm. Equus? I’d love to see the American Dolls do the Trial Before Pilate scene from Jesus Christ Superstar.
Holding out for the all puppy recreation of “Battleship Potemkin” but thanks.
Battleshihtzu Puptemkin
or the lavatorial Battleshits Podumpkin
Didn’t they do that in the first Harold & Kumar?
Cupcakes are for closers!
Bunraku meets Broadway!https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bunraku
Second City did a mashup of GGGR and Glass Menagerie to come up with “Glass Mamet”. If you can find the clip, it’s funny.
I’ll stick with this version:https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/dd4888ea-e32d-49b0-ae20-22a706c21f30#LSQZcZ7Yvv.copy
Before anyone complains about the lack of that Alec Baldwin monologue, it wasn’t in the original play.